Can an ultrasound be 4 1/2 weeks off?? Am I the Father??

[Reevesboy]

You all can call me REEVES and I appreciate the insight.

Okay, so this is quite a dilemma of mine, I hope I can explain this well. Anyway, I met this girl in Late November/2015.

We had intercourse on November 30th, 2015 and on December 4th 2015.

I had no physical contact with her whatsoever after those dates. So, she contacts me on January 25, 2016 saying she is pregnant, and that I am the only one she slept with this whole time. She sent me picture of the test, and records of a prenatal prescription. ( I know she has had a long time boyfriend, so that was in the back of my mind, but I never ruled myself out of the possibility that I might be the father)

She had her first ultrasound on February 25, 2016 and it stated that the Gestation Age (GA) was 9w 0d. I know of the two weeks of conception, so the fetal size is 7w 0d.

If I were the father she would've been 13w 3d roughly, with a fetal size of 11w 3d. I know there are big changes that occur in this time period for the fetus that are really important for development, so the doctor would've been able to tell if the fetus was further along. Especially a gap of 4 1/2 weeks.

With this info, it would put Conception in a window from January 1, 2016 - January 11th, 2016. Now again, I didn't have any physical contact with her after December 4th.

I haven't been in talked to her since (February 10) about 2 weeks before her ultrasound (on Feb.25, 2016) that determined the GA (It was determined by measurements/length of the baby)  I've gathered all of this from her posting the ultrasound on Social Networks. I also saw her boyfriend posting the U/S as well. They both seem to be joyed.

But she hasn't contacted me to tell me I'm not the father. I don't expect her to, but I'm sure she knows whether I am or not. Having discussed this with her OB/ GYN. To be certain enough it is in fact her boyfriend's.
I don't believe she was lying to me, she may have genuinely thought It was a possibility I was the father until she got her scan done.

Can a scan be 4 1/2 weeks off that early??

[Reevesboy]

Thank you so much Annie, I finally wrote her letting her know I saw the results of her U/S, now I believe the issue is settled and she is happy it is her boyfriends.

[AnnieBrooke]

No, there is no law that gets you out of taking a DNA test, and it is hard to see how you would be a tool to get back at her boyfriend in any case.  In fact, if requested to take a test, you would be crazy to refuse one, not to mention ungentlemanly.  She was kind enough to have sex with you with no demands and no commitment (a social situation your great-grandfather would be very envious to hear exists in the world today), and the very least you can do in return is go get a test in the unlikely event she asks for a test.  That's the price men pay for getting free sex in this day and age -- occasionally they need to take a test.  For the sake of the lady, who does not sound like she is trying to blackmail you (or even contact you), don't be a jerk if a test request comes in.  I don't think it sounds like she will ask you to test, but if she does, go, and look everyone right in the eye and for heaven's sake stop acting like you are terrified or have a guilty secret.  In the meantime -- let it go, stop brooding, stop coming up with fanciful scenarios and demands for the legal system to save you.  This is just one of those things that sometimes happens to men who have sex.  Think how much tougher it is for the woman, who is essentially holding the bag.  

[AnnieBrooke]

In short, if she is no longer contacting you about it, it sounds like the issue is settled in her mind.  There is no law against her having told you back before she had more information from the ultrasound that there was a possibility you were the father, it was what she knew then.  But now she hasn't contacted you for a month and a half, it seems like paternity is clear to her, and if you didn't expect her to contact you if the other guy is the dad, you should stop with the "what ifs." She is not harassing you or asking you for anything, there is no law against her leaving you alone.

[Reevesboy]

Thank you so much I am a bit obsessive; but I am speaking of a scenario of the baby not being mine, but she is claiming it is for child support, or any other circumstance she may have. I'm sure she wouldn't do that but I don't know much about her, I hardly know her. I just don't want to be used as a tool to get back at her boyfriend from a dispute of some sort. And is there any conception laws to where I would be exempt of taking a paternity test depending on that gap of 4 1/2 weeks difference??

[AnnieBrooke]

As I said, a scan is not going to be 4 1/2 weeks off even by the end of pregnancy, much less earlier.  What kind of law are you talking about when you say "prevents me from being scammed if that were an issue"?  By "being scammed," are you envisualizing a scenario that the baby is yours and you would not be told, or that the baby is not yours and you would be told it was for child support purposes?  (The latter is easy enough to take care of with a DNA test.)

As I said already, she probably did think she was pregnant by you (or could be), back before the ultrasound.  And while you would have hoped she would let you know immediately about the ultrasound results, possibly she didn't think you would be this worried.  If you are friendly with her in general, write her a note (not on social media, a real note with paper and pen that you mail) saying "I saw on your post that the scan shows your boyfriend is the dad.  Congratulations to you both."  Then for heaven's sake, stop obsessing.

[Reevesboy]

Thank you, I really appreciate your insight on my situation. It has helped me out a lot reading your post, I have one more question for you because I don't think I included these details the due date is Sep. 30th 2016.

The U/S on 02/25/2016 stated she was 9w 0d GA

What were her possible conception dates???

[AnnieBrooke]

Around January 7 or 8.

[Reevesboy]

So can I completely rule myself out as the possible father w/ the ultrasound stating an EDD on 9/30/2016 with a Gestational Age of 9w 0d?? Thank you so much, I really appreciate your help. Maybe I'm just over thinking about this situation

[AnnieBrooke]

No.  A scan is not 4 1/2 weeks off even by the end of pregnancy.

She probably did think she was pregnant by you (or could be), back before the ultrasound.  It would have been kind of her to let you know immediately about the ultrasound results, but perhaps she didn't think you were so worried, or maybe she just is embarrassed that she gave you a false alarm and doesn't quite know what to say.  You should make paper copies of all her posts (take screen shots) for your own protection against later false claims, and then if you are friendly with her in general, write her a note (not on social media) saying "I saw on your post that the scan shows your boyfriend is the dad.  Congratulations to you both."  That way you won't have to wait for her to write to you, she'll be able to handle her embarrassment, and it will be clear you can't be scammed either (if that would ever be an issue).

[Reevesboy]

So, I can completely rule myself out as the possible father?? Is there any law (conception law) that protects me from being scammed if that were an issue? Thank you so much by the way. You've helped me out a lot!