Help! Just need reassurance!

[Jean1738]

My bf and I had a argument.  I sleep with my ex on sept 2 I used spermicide but no condom. My bf and I made up and we slept together on  sept 4,10,17,24. I did not get my period that month. I went to the doctor oct 22 and I was 7w5d according to sonogram.  Can some please help me!  I not sure who is the father is because  my doc told me spermicide only works 70% of the time.

[AnnieBrooke]

Hi, Jean and congratulations!  I just saw your note from May 8.  You probably already found this out, but you don't need a blood draw once the baby is here, you just need a swab in the mouth.  

Congrats again, love little babies!!!

[Jean1738]

Just wanted you to know baby is the bf. she look soooo much him. We both are happy!!

[Jean1738]

Also can you tell me what 7w5d<3% means. The was on my first ultra sound with CRL 1.42cm?

[Jean1738]

I have been scheduled for a c-section on May 27th the beginning of my 39th week. I am so nervous because I really want this baby to be my bf. it  scares me to think this baby could be my ex.  Both are nice guys but the bf is who I really want as the father of my child.   If this baby turns out to be the ex I know it is over between bf and I he has way to much ego. I have been doing really well until now my nervous are beginning to kick in to over drive.   I am not what to do with these nerves until the baby get her. My family is come down and I don't want him saying anything about a blood test in front of them.  Can you tell me how we can discretely get a blood test in the hospital. Can I just send the bf to the lab before my child is born and have his blood drawn? Then later have the baby's blood done?

[Jean1738]

Thank you so much for your responses. I really appreciate it.  Your words are comforting and I will try and just focus on having a healthy baby. By the way I am having a girl.

[AnnieBrooke]

A due date that changes after your first trimester simply reflects that the baby is growing at a faster or slower rate than average, it doesn't change who the father is.  

Since your boyfriend is more likely to be the dad and this is mostly just for confirmation, the big advantage of waiting is that the cost of the DNA test after the baby is born is only a fraction of what it would be if you did the test now.  If it's bugging you that much and you have an extra two thousand dollars in your bank account, go test with the other guy and pay for the test yourself.  But it doesn't sound like you are saying that the other guy is dangerous and will come kill you and the baby if it turns out to be his, or some other life-and-death situation.  I appreciate that you hate not knowing for 1000% certain, but remember that the dates favor your boyfriend, and also remember the most important point, you're going to have a wonderful little baby!  Lucky you!!!  Your boyfriend is probably thinking of how far two thousand dollars will go towards baby furnishings and bills, not such a bad mindset to have.

[Jean1738]

I ask my boyfriend to get the test done by the company you gave me the link to he just said he rather wait.  I am going crazy.  On January 15, I had my 20 week check up along with sonogram and they moved my due date back to May 24, 2014.  Does this make it a strong possibility that the baby is my ex. please help me. I am going crazy!  

[Jean1738]

I read the article. Thanks I will be looking into both companies.

[AnnieBrooke]

Here is a reference:

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/06/20/health/paternity-blood-tests-that-work-early-in-a-pregnancy.html?pagewanted=all&_r=1&

[Jean1738]

What are the two labs?

[AnnieBrooke]

A test is available, you and at least one of the fathers would have to give a blood sample. It is not invasive to the baby and hardly invasive to you, but it is very costly at around $2,000.  You also would have to be very careful to use one (of the only two) reputable labs, not just an outfit that advertises on the Internet.  

[Jean1738]

I got the due date from my doctor. The stress of this situation is just bothering me. Do you know of a non evasive way I can have a DNA test done?

[AnnieBrooke]

Did you get the June 3 due date from the doctor who did the ultrasound, or is it something you computed yourself? If it was from the doctor, the evidence points to your boyfriend; i.e., that you got pregnant about ten days past the September 2 incident.  In your shoes, I would go forward on the assumption that the baby is your boyfriend's, but also get a DNA test after the baby is born so you will never have to wonder.

[Jean1738]

Forgot to mention I am due June 3.