Paternity

[Ma2b88]

I feel really ashamed right now to even be asking about this. However, I just want to alleviate the stress of wondering who my baby's father could possibly be when it already is a tough situation. I just found out I'm pregnant on 1-25-15 and although I am pretty certain whose it could be I know there is no guarantee. I'm going to include the chart for this month. I'm already familiar that the sperm can stay inside for about 3-6 days. What throws me off is the day I started spotting.
1/1/2015: First day of period 1/5/2015: Last day of period 1/6/2015: Slept with guy 1 1/8/2015: Slept with guy 2
1/11/2015: First day of fertile window 1/13/2015: Very fertile; slept with guy 3 who did not ejaculate; 1/15/2015; ovulation day and felt crampy and extra cm guy 3 pulled out; 1/16/2015; slept with guy 3 pulled out; light pink spotting; 1/17 slept with guy 3 still felt crampy; 1/18 slept with guy 3; 1/22; extra white CM tender breasts nauseous; 1/23 negative PT; 1/24 negative PT and then very very faint line; 1/25 positive PT; period is due 1-27 or 1-28

[AnnieBrooke]

OK, I see.  Because the dates were all on a horizontal line above, I was associating the action with the date that followed it, not the date that came before it.  Let's see if I can put it into column form --

1/1 - First day of period
1/5 - Last day of period
1/6 - Slept with guy 1
1/8 - Slept with guy 2
1/11- First day of fertile window
1/13 - Ovulation symptoms; slept with guy 3 who did not ejaculate
1/15 - Presumed ovulation, crampy, extra cm slept with guy 3 pulled out
1/16 - Slept with guy 3 pulled out; light pink spotting
1/17- Slept with guy 3 still felt crampy
1/18 - Slept with guy 3
1/22 - Extra white cm, tender breasts, nauseous
1/23 - Negative PT
1/24 - Negative PT, then faint line
1/25 - Positive PT
Period is due 1-27 or 1-28

Let's look at this all.  First, was all the sex unprotected with guy 1, 2 and 3?  (Have you had a test for any STDs?)  Given what you are describing, even Guy 1 could have had live sperm in your system by the time you ovulated, but you're right that, just going by the dates, he's the least likely.  Not by much, though.

I should say that in fact all of my comments are based merely on the calendar.  You really need an ultrasound.  (I recommend you schedule it now, vaginal and abdominal, at a good ob-gyn, and see if you can get in the week of February 9.  That will be in your sixth week, counting from the first day of your last period, and it is a very good time to get as close to pinpoint accuracy.  I would not let this slip until even the eighth week, a sixth or seventh week ultrasound can help you a lot, but after the eighth the margin for error gets bigger and by the twelfth week it's big enough to encompass all three guys.  You need precision.  

Not everyone ovulates at the same point in their cycle like clockwork.  But if we assume you were indeed about to have a period on the 27th or 28th if you hadn't gotten pregnant, we could say your ovulation "should" have come on or around the 12th, 13th or 14th.  Despite your symptoms (or in fact because of them), I think the 15th sounds too late. (Often we're more crampy just after ovulating than we are when the egg pops out, and your dates don't add up to ovulating as late as the 15th if you are right about when your period was going to come.)

Anyway, this scenario is just enough to rule out Guy 1, barely.  (I'd still test with him, though.)  It doesn't rule out Guy 2 or Guy 3.  Though obviously Guy 3 had more opportunities, he was just on the verge of being too late.  One would have to assume that during one of the pulling-out episodes he still had some sperm enter your system, in order to assume he is who got you pregnant.

What doesn't matter in your scenario is how creamy your CM was, when you first had a positive on a pregnancy test, or how light or dark the line is on the test, unless it is really super light and you read the test past the 10-minute time window.  (If that's the case, you might just be seeing an evaporation line.)  But a line on a pregnancy test this early can be pale or dark based only on how diluted your urine is, and won't indicate how long you've been preggers.

I'd grab a bunch of Dollar Store tests, and take one each morning for a while, at the same time of day, with what you can do to be sure your urine is about the same amount of concentrated.  In the meantime, get on the phone and find a decent ob-gyn and book a good ultrasound.  Write back when you get one.

[Ma2b88]

Also to add I took another test today. It was the Frer and I figured I would see a pretty visible line. It is still very very faint. I figured it would be darker than the one I took on Sun (3 days ago) but not much. Since today was my expected period I wanted to see how my HCG levels were progressing and the lines were still really light. If it was Guy 2 I am assuming the lines would be pretty dark by now considering we had sex on Jan 7.

[Ma2b88]

I am so sorry. I have a 3 yr old and 2 yr old from a previous marriage so I have been so distracted while writing these posts. I started my period on Jan 1. Spotted on the 16th. I was due for my period yesterday or today Jan 27/28. And my periods last 5 days.

[AnnieBrooke]

OK, let's try again.  You're saying your cycle is usually 27-28 days, and you have described that your last one began January 5, and you expected it January 27 or 28.  That's a 22- to 23-day cycle.  (Or, are you saying you think the spotting on January 1 was the first day of your cycle?)  I'm just trying to work out the implications (when you would ovulate) with a 22-23 day cycle, and why you're not commenting that it was unusually short -- have they been that short a few times lately?  This would help to know, because I'm trying to work out when you would have ovulated.  If your cycles are really only 22 to 23 days long, the second guy would be more in range than the third guy.

I understand that you believe the third guy is the dad.  I'm just trying to work out if the facts support it.

[Ma2b88]

My cycles are usually 27/28 days. My period should have started yesterday or today'. 1-27/1-28.  My period lasts 5 days. My true positive with a digital was Sun 1-25. My belief is I found out 3 days prior to expected period.

[AnnieBrooke]

Did you take the pregnancy tests (the ones on the 23rd and 24th) with first-morning, concentrated urine, or were they later in the day?  Please answer, I am trying to decide how accurate they are (false negatives are possible).  Are you describing that you had spotting followed in four days by a two-day period (1/5-1/6)?  Are your periods usually only two days long?  Please answer, it will help to decide if you were pregnant before the period.  The cycle you describe is a 22- or 23-day cycle.  Was that the only time you've had a cycle this short, or is it becoming more of a norm?  

[Ma2b88]

I have never been in this mess before. Guy 1 never ejaculated. Guy 2 was my ex bf. Him and I have hooked up for a year not on birth control and he always came in me and I never have been pregnant. My cycles are typically 27/28 days however they have slightly varied lately. I feel like I knew when I ovulated which was the week I hooked up with guy 3. I felt crampy, moody, and high libido. The spotting is what throws me off. Implantation bleeding is 6-12 days after conception 3-5 days before period. Could it be ovulation spotting or from intercourse? Because if it was implantation bleeding on the 16/or 17 that would make it guy 2 right? I took a PT on the 23rd negative. On the 24th it was a very very very faint pink line after the window. If my cycle was sooner than 27/28 days my hcg levels would be higher to detect it. On the 25th I took another one...same thing. very very very faint and didn't see it until after the window. That night I took a digital which came up positive. I had what felt like menstrual cramping on the 24th...could that be the implantation? Which would make it Guy 3. My intuition tells me it is Guy 3. However, the spotting is very confusing.

[elibel913]

if I may comment. I think it reads the first day of her period was 1st of Jan lasting till 5th jan and she has 27/28 day cycles.

Did the first two guys ejaculate ?

[AnnieBrooke]

Did you take the pregnancy tests on the 23rd and 24th with first-morning, concentrated urine?  Is a two-day period (1/5-1/6) normal for you, and is a 22 or 23-day cycle also normal for you?