DNA / Paternity Community
Scared and confused
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Scared and confused

Please help!
I am 6 and a half week pregnant, and I slept with 2 men in the week I fell pregnant.
Who do you think is the father??
My last period was Jan 7th, and I slept with my boyfriend on 22nd Jan (the 16th day of my cycle) and my EX boyfriend (very late at night) on Jan 26th (day 20 of my cycle).
I took the "Morning After Pill" within 36hrs of sleeping with my ex, which was Jan 28th.
And then 2wks later I found out I was pregnant.
Do you think it's safe to assume it was the first man??
I am considering a prenatal paternity test to make sure, but I have to wait until I am at least 10wks pregnant.
10 Comments Post a Comment
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134578_tn?1404951303
By the timing, it sounds likely the baby is your boyfriend's and that you were already pregnant before taking the morning-after pill.  But the literature for the morning-after pill does say it is not effective 1 time out of 8.  What is the normal length of your cycle?  If it is long (like 33 days instead of 28) you could have ovulated late.  I assume the sex with the ex was unprotected?

Have you gotten an ultrasound?  If you are 6 weeks or more, that would be a good time for a scan, and from that they will give you an estimated due date, and it would be pretty accurate for purposes of dating conception.  (For conception, count back 266 days not 280.)  If you intend to get an early ultrasound, this week or next week, will give you the most likely chance of getting it spot on.  (Since the men are so close together, you need the most precision possible.)

If you are thinking of a prenatal paternity test, only two companies are worth using, the others are notorious for wrong answers.  And keep in mind that even the two best are not yet certified by the courts, the way post-natal labs can be certified for accuracy.
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Avatar_f_tn
Thank you so much for your advice!!!
I was a little bit nervous about the prenatal testing, because it will cost me $1700 and for tht price it better be 100% accurate!!!
My cycle is usually 28 days, so I hope and pray it is my boyfriends!!
I am getting an ultrasound done in 3 days time, when I am 7wks. So hopefully they can see enough to tell me a much more accurate age of my baby.
That's great advice to count back 266 days from my due date!!
I can't thank you enough !!! :)
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134578_tn?1404951303
Write back when you get an estimated due date.  Also, remember that doctors count gestational age as beginning on day 1 of your last period.   If the doc looks at you and says "You are 9 weeks 6 days pregnant," and you think it's been 7 weeks 6 days since presumed conception, he probably thinks so too.  If you aren't clear on what he is saying, ask specifically, using the word "conception" or "conceive" (or possibly "ovulation.")  I.e., "9 weeks 6 days gestational age?  Then when might I have conceived?"  

Good luck, and write back, and I'll try to help confirm the numbers you get.
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Avatar_f_tn
AnnieBrooke, I had my ultrasound today. She said I was 6wks and 2 days today (Tues Feb 26th) which means that I most likely conceived the wkend that I was with my ex !!
Although she calculated that my period "should have" started on Jan 14th, and it actually started on Jan 7th. So she was out by a whole week.
But that still didn't change the age she estimated my baby was. She still says 6wks and 2 days, (which if you remove the first 2wks as they usually do) coincides to the exact date that I slept with my ex.
So I am really freaking out now. And, as you said, prenatal paternity tests might not give me the correct answer either.
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134578_tn?1404951303
The fact that your boyfriend was the 22nd and the other guy was the 26th doesn't rule out the boyfriend as the dad, since sperm can live up to 5 or 6 days in your system.  (I assume the sex was unprotected?)  Unfortunately from what you describe, conception the weekend of the 26th could give you a baby from either man.
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Avatar_f_tn
Yes the sex with both was unprotected. The only contraception I used with the ex was the morning after pill, which is only 85% effective.
I'm very disappointed that I didn't get a more certain answer from the ultrasound, but n
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134578_tn?1404951303
Read the article in the link before you decide what to do with prenatal DNA testing.

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/06/20/health/paternity-blood-tests-that-work-early-in-a-pregnancy.html?pagewanted=all&_r=1&

Good luck!
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Avatar_f_tn
Thank you so much!! That article put a lot of my fears to rest.
I was paranoid that the company doing the non-incmvasive test could be a scam or a fraud. Because it sounded too good to be true.
But now, I am more confident that it is a legitimate procedure.
I am in Australia, and have found one company that has been recommended by my doctor.
So now I jst have to wait to get to the 10wk mark.
It will be a long wait.
Thank you SO much for your help and support, it means more to me than you know :)
I will fill you in on my results in a few weeks time!!
Fingers crossed its my boyfriend's.
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134578_tn?1404951303
If you are going to use anyone's test besides the two mentioned in the article, doctor recommendation or not, I would look to see if they are certified by the courts for paternity testing where you live, and if they are peer-reviewed.  Especially if you are intending drastic action if the answer comes back as not your boyfriend's, I would also test both men, high cost or no. (Because what if both tests came back as 'not the father?')  A poster on this forum recently spent $1,700 for a test and it was inaccurate, and now she is out the money and is testing again with one of the two companies in the article, and learned that the company with whom she is testing now often sees re-testing clients (testing after another company gave them wrong results).  Unless your doctor has made a special scientific study of the issue, look for other information to back up his recommendation.
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134578_tn?1404951303
Please also see:  

http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg20827893.200-the-danger-of-unreliable-paternity-tests.html?full=true

From what other posters report, "DNA Plus" is one of the unreliable ones, so I am hoping it is not the one you are considering using.
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