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Avatar universal

What's wrong with me

I keep thinking over and over about all of these different scenarios that may lead to my boyfriend not being the father of my baby. At first I was focusing on a night where I had drank too much and messed around with a man, but this had happened almost two weeks after what my scans are telling me, now I'm worried that maybe that had happened sooner and somehow i keep making myself second guess when it happened, I'm thinking it was during the 5 days I could have gotten pregnant that month and that the baby is going to come out not looking like my boyfriend and everyone is going to hate me and I'll be alone. I am due in 3 weeks and I'm scared. And can't talk to anyone about it. I don't know why my thoughts are consuming my everyday life. Any advice?
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134578 tn?1693250592
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi, we've been into this already in depth.  Perhaps you could talk to a counselor about the guilt, because obviously everything everyone is saying to you on this site is not helping.
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Avatar universal
So talk to your doctor,maybe it'll relax your mind and let you enjoy the last days of your pregnancy.
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6 Comments
Yeah I did mention it to my doctor and she kind of shrugged it off. But I think the thing that gets me is how drunk I was, I don't even know 100% what happened or the exact day it happened. I'm just hoping to find some peace. I've really been punishing myself every waking day
Did she tell you it would be your boyfriends ?
She told me that he will most likely come out looking like my bf and then I'll feel better, but in the meantime I just worry. I double check dates, put in the latest time I could have ovulated in the calculators online, check my text messages to try and get an idea of what night I had the one night stand ( but still don't know exactly) I just don't know what's going on and i just want some peace of mind! ☹️
Yeah same here, your just over thinking it and it's a guitkt
Guilty feeling *** , I'm in the same bout as you . But hey as long as our ultrasounds and dates match to our boyfriends we told our doctor about it were fine . but if you wanna be sure he's his why don't you do a DNA test at home ? So that feeling will go away .
I can't tell my bf that there is any doubt in my mind. So I wouldn't be able to test him. The thought of it coming back negative is enough to freak me out even more. Oh well. I guess I need to just let whatever happens happens. But it's been a rough few months mentally
Avatar universal
Its easier said than done, but don't let it consume you. .. what ever is going to happen,  well it's just going to happen and stessing your self won't change this.


Anywho

A woman with a average 28 day cycle conceives 2 weeks (10-14 days after lmp )

Example.  Lets just say a woman has a period January 17th. Has sex with guy A on January 26th. But... starts her period Feb 18th. Guy A isn't the father.  

Then she has sex March 1st, with guy B  doesn't start her period March 17th, ending in positive test. Guy B is the father  

But, if she had sex with guy A & B only a few weeks apart, in the same cycle,  only a DNA test would be able to tell  

A woman's egg only survives 24 hours while a males sperm can survive up to 7 days waiting for a egg. So with in a two week period with in the same cycle,  both males sperm can still be up there waiting.  When in fact only one is successful.  

Hope this helps & good luck!!!  
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3 Comments
The thing is that this whole time I've been certain that the sex with the other man took place a week and a half after my ovulation date. But now all of a sudden I'm dreading that maybe it happened around the same time as the sex with my bf. I don't know it's like my mind isn't allowing me to relax and enjoy my pregnancy without stressing or focusing on little details. Even though my bf and I had sex with ejaculate 2 days before my expected ovulation. So I don't know
Going threw the same thing as you , over thinking and stressing  not being able to  enjoy my pregnancy.
My doctor gave me anxiety medicine and it has helped me . I told her my situation I told her details , step by step and she told me straight up the guy that I had some what sexual intercouse with  (his penis wouldn't go in first time , then a week later we tried again but with protection and he didn't finish) He wasn't the father  and my boyfriend was
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