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Avatar universal

advice

I give birth in about 5 to 6 weeks. The guy who I thought was the father M is very distant from me so I decided to break up with him. I am saving my self from a heartache I really love him but I'd baby is not his I know he won't be with me. I been really depressed and sad everything I cry so much bc it hurts. My due date is Nov 3 in March 15 I had an ultrasound and they said I was 8 weeks. I had sex with him feb 13 and 14. The other guy t who is also my ex bf we had sex in Jan I can't remember the dates but it was multiple times. I was on birth control until the 25 of jan on the patch had a regular period Jan 12. I put on the next patch on the 19 and got off bc on the 25 or around the time and had a period around the 26 but only for about 3 days. I can't remember but I am sure I didn't have sex with t on Jan but t never came inside me we where together for about 4 years and used the withdrawal method and I never got pregnant. With M we had unprotected sex and he came inside me. I just need advice not only on who the father might be but how to deal with not knowing for the next 5 weeks and later I love M and I know t would be a great father they both know about this and have been very supportive I know they would make great fathers. T thinks the baby isn't his but willing to race him and m is existed he thinks baby is his but I know he doesn't love me enough. I feel so a shame everyone asks me who the father is and I say m idk how I am going to survive for the next month just thinking about this. So any advice on my situation.
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Avatar universal
Ok I see what you are saying and I agree with you. But the baby does not look black at all maybe it's ignorant of me to say that but he looks a lot like the the guy who I think is the father.  Well thank you for the advice and I am thinking about doing the test the legal way and will test both guys.
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134578 tn?1693250592
COMMUNITY LEADER
If you think that the guy who is most likely to be the dad, or either guy, is interested in not being found out to be the dad, you should definitely do this the legal way, with both guys being served to go to a lab certified by the court, and to show ID, and so forth.  You're in a tough spot if you are in Alaska and one guy is in South Carolina.  You can't do this with a drugstore test, you need legal help.  The results have to be able to stand up in court.
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Avatar universal
What do you mean faking the test? I am thinking to ask for child support I have been trying to reach him and he doesn't want to do anything with me do you think me filing would be a good idea. I feel like doesn't care about my baby. I know I am going to need the help.
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134578 tn?1693250592
COMMUNITY LEADER
DDC is one of the best.  I'm sure they can test you in Alaska and the guy in South Carolina and the other guy too.  I would test both guys, especially if there is any risk of either guy faking the test.  You need a definite yes.
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Avatar universal
Hi so my baby is born and as I suspected guy number 2 is the father. I know this because he is white and the other guy is black. He looks like just like his father. My question is I am still doing a paternity test just because to be 100 percent. We live in different states so how would I go about doing this? Is dcc credible I live in alaska and he lives in south carolina.  
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Avatar universal
Ok thank you the lady I talk to I told her about what's going on and she said that I had gotten pregnant after valentine's day or around that time the only problem is that it contradicts the earlier ultrasound but I will ask this on my appointment. Thank you once again.
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134578 tn?1693250592
COMMUNITY LEADER
Do remember that your weeks (like 7 weeks 3 days) gestational age are computed from the (calculated) first day of your last period.   Be SURE when you talk to the doctor that you explain that you want to know, from the measurements of the baby in your earliest possible ultrasound that you have on file, when you might have CONCEIVED.  If a doc or nurse says you're 8 weeks "pregnant," since they usually count from an assumed first day of your last period, they are not answering the question of when you conceived.  8 weeks "pregnant" in doctor language is 6 weeks since conception.  So do talk to the doctor, and try to keep the language clear when you discuss this.  He or she will be in the very best position to tell you what is going on, given that he or she has your records.
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Avatar universal
So new info I called cpc to find out about my ultrasound I had there on March 24 or 17 can't remember. The lady told me that I had concive after valentine's day. She said I was 7 weeks and 3 days. I am confused bc of the other ultrasound vi had on the 15. I am going to ask my doctor.  Thank you
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134578 tn?1693250592
COMMUNITY LEADER
It does not sound like the guy from February 13 and 14 is the dad.  It sounds like you got pregnant around the 1st of February, which could have readily happened from the sex in late January.  When you got the ultrasound that said you were 8 weeks along on March 15, was it 8 weeks and some days?  Or 8 weeks exactly?  
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