please help?! need opinions on who could be the father of my unborn child!

[melimel523708]

Okay, so for whoever wants to possibly help me with this situation,please feel free to give me some feedback. I had unprotected sex with a guy jan 5th this year.Plan b was takin 65 hours after.It was a 72 hour pill..I had a period February 8 it was normal. Decided to get back with my ex of 8 yrs shortly after & had unprotected sex sum of jan & all throughout February with him (please dont judge) :/  but he never ejaculated in me..Which has never been a problem with getting pregnant for us in the past. In march i missed my period.I went to take a test three days after my missed period and my pregnancy test was positive.I went right away to get a ultrasound to see if I could have been further along and possibly been pregnant from that guy in January and just still had a period feb..they couldn't see anything in my uterus and they said that I must have been barely 4 weeks pregnant because they would4 sure see something in there by 5 wks..I believe I would have been 9 weeks pregnant if it were from the January 5th encounter..So that made me feel a little better about it being my current boyfriends.. Still in the back of my head I was worried and still am. I went April 8th for a 8 wk ultrasound which are supposed to be pretty accurate and I was right at 8 wks..As I should be if it were my boyfriends, it also matched up with my last missed period..so with those dates the conception date would have been anywhere between February 17th and February 26, according to my ultrasounds and missed period..pretty far off from jan 5th right ??.I had another ultrasound 14 weeks to see the gender which was May 17th and it said I was 13 weeks which was a couple days less far along than i thought..but I know ultrasounds are not going to have the same exact dates every time & that's pretty normal for them to be a couple days off even a week.I guess that's where I'm concerned ..I can't stop freaking out about whether or not it's possible for me to be pregnant by the guy I was seeing in January and not my long time boyfriend..This is a horrible feeling.. I called the people who gave me my 8 week ultrasound and asked if it was possible for it to be a month off and they said one week at the most .. def not a month..an 8 week ultrasound is supposed be very accurate because the baby is still so small they all grow at the same rate up in till about 13 weeks..Which makes me feel better cuz that would mean it is in fact my boyfriends for sure..Also all my morning sickness went away right when I was supposed to be 13 weeks I wasn't even able to hear the heartbeat at 11 wks because it was the baby was still too small..So as far as all that gos I think I'm good, and I really do think it's my boyfriendS..I just can't stop worrying about it it's driving me crazy!! Please help reassure me.

[AnnieBrooke]

You might try a minister, if you can find a congregation that is liberal enough to accept that you had a couple of lovers.  It is not that uncommon for a woman to sleep with one man after breaking up with another, and most pastoral counselors have heard worse.  At the very least, I'd say, listen to your doctor, and try not to worry.

Take care,

Annie

[melimel523708]

AnnieBrook.
Thanks so much for your response.Yes definetly some guilt issues going on here.I askd for opinions and you gave me yours. No worries. I mean, I think you could be right. I am a big worrier With just about everything in my life, thats just me. So its pretty normal for me to be to be obsessivly freaking out about something like this, even when ultrasounds are pointing in the right direction for me. I know im the only one who could change the thoughts in my head, but i honestly do think it would make me feel better if I came on here and got some feedback from people who have had a similar experience as me, or if people really thought I had noo reason to worry, it would make me feel better, only because I don't really have anybody that I feel like opening up to about this, as far as friends & family. So I have kept this all tp myself. I just dont want to have all of our familys there meeting our new baby, and then for some crazy reason have it not even be his. I've just never been with two people so Close together, so it is kinda scary 4 me.I would go see a counselor, but I can't afford one at the moment.Thanks again for your response.

[melimel523708]

AnnieBrook.
Thanks so much for your response.Yes definetly some guilt issues going on here.I askd for opinions and you gave me yours. No worries. I mean, I think you could be right. I am a big worrier With just about everything in my life, thats just me. So its pretty normal for me to be to be obsessivly freaking out about something like this, even when ultrasounds are pointing in the right direction for me. I know im the only one who could change the thoughts in my head, but i honestly do think it would make me feel better if I came on here and got some feedback from people who have had a similar experience as me, or if people really thought I had noo reason to worry, it would make me feel better, only because I don't really have anybody that I feel like opening up to about this, as far as friends & family. So I have kept this all tp myself. I just dont want to have all of our familys there meeting our new baby, and then for some crazy reason have it not even be his. I've just never been with two people so Close together, so it is kinda scary 4 me.I would go see a counselor, but I can't afford one at the moment.Thanks again for your response.

[AnnieBrooke]

Or, if it is not shame, the counselor would still be useful in helping you to understand why you are freaking out so much in the face of medical assurances that the ultrasound can't be 4 weeks wrong.  

I hope you don't think me unsympathetic, but having been down this road before with posters, I can say pretty safely that when someone whose dates do not add up to the wrong guy is still freaking out despite having talked to her doctors, it doesn't help her to hear the same thing as the doctors have already said.  One woman wrote in 105 times, saying "But what if the doctor is WRONG?" and "Would you bet money on it?" and "Are you 1000% sure?"   She had other doubts, about her life with a baby and the guy who was the father, and she let them settle on the dates as a way to handle her anxiety.  If other issues are on a person's mind, no amount of comforting statements about ultrasounds will help, she needs to address the other issues.

[AnnieBrooke]

It sounds like you have no reason to worry about the dates, but are anyway, which sometimes means that the person is dealing with a guilty conscience and it is easier to obsess over dates than to face up to having had sex with someone else.  If that is the problem, see a therapist or counselor about how to put things into perspective.  No amount of parsing the dates will solve feelings of shame at having slept with someone else, if that is the real root of the issue.