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who am I pregnant by...
I am about 18 weeks pregnant and 1 day. My due date is March 22,2018. I'm very nervous as to who I am pregnant by. I had unprotected sex with my boyfriend and he came inside of me (June 21,2017). I then did something stupid and had unprotected sex with a ex (June 26,2017) but immediately after I took a plan b. Maybe 28 hours after... (totally forgetting about June 21, was just so worried and didn't want to take any chances.) I do the conception calculator online and it says (June 24-June 29) which scares me even more because I know sperm can live up to 5-7 days and the 29th is 8 whole days after. Can someone please help...
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134578 tn?1483549754
I assume that that you know Plan B is only effective 7 times out of 8, according to the company's own literature? On the face of it, it sounds like you got pregnant around the 29th, which would be too late for your boyfriend to be the dad.

This kind of speculation is only going to be as reliable as your due date is reliable, though. How did you get your due date? Was it from an ultrasound in your 6th or 7th week? Or did someone (yourself, or the doctor using a little cardboard wheel) just count forward from the first day of your last period? If the latter method was used, how consistent are your menstrual cycles? A counting-forward-from-last-period estimate is only going to be correct if the woman's cycles come every 28 days like clockwork, without fail, month after month after month.



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Wow...

I got my first sonogram whenever I was about 6-7 weeks but they had said I was due March 28.
I went to my actual OB doctor about 2 weeks ago and she said my due date was actually March 22.
My periods do last 7 days. Every 28 days. I really can't remember if I started my period on May 29 or ended it but I do know May 29 I was on my period because I did not want to swim.
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134578 tn?1483549754
What does "I got my first sonogram whenever" mean? (and when you say you recently went to your "actual OB doctor," who did you go to for the 'sonogram whenever'? Do you think the sonogram that you had in your early pregnancy should be ignored for some reason?)

Also, if you were given the due date of March 28 from your first sonogram, why did your doctor change the due date, do you know?

You mentioned being on your the May 29 period. It would be more significant to know when your June period was, since you're worried about sex June 21 and June 29. Unless you are saying you did not have another period after May 29. If your periods are every 28 days like clockwork, you should have had one in June.

Finally, did you and your boyfriend have sex after the June 29 sex with the other guy? If the "ultrasound whenever" was really in your 6th or 7th week, it projects that you got pregnant around July 5. Did you have sex with your boyfriend around that time, or only with the June 29 guy?
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This is crazy...

I had got a first sonogram at pregnancy lifeline. It's just like a facility where they help give pregnancy test and free sonograms. When I went to my doctor my actual OB doctor she said everything the pregnancy lifeline place told me couldn't be correct. My OB even got that sonogram they did and measured everything herself. That's when she said I'm actually 18 weeks. I did not have a period in June. I honestly actually took a plan b in late March. So that's why I was thinking I wasn't going to get a period ( it always messes up my entire cycle) I have a scheduled sono on Nov 1 so I will just ask when did I possible conceive...
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134578 tn?1483549754
When you say you "honestly actually" took a plan b in late March, were you saying that is a corrected date and the only Plan B you had taken, or are you saying you took Plan B in March and again in June?
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134578 tn?1483549754
Sorry, just re-read and by "June 29" sex I should be saying "June 26" sex.
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134578 tn?1483549754
Here is what I'm thinking so far from what you are saying.

- You had an early ultrasound at a place your doctor subsequently thought couldn't be correct, which ultrasound's due date (March 28) suggests a conception date of July 5. (I was asking you if you had sex with your boyfriend around July 5 for a reason. If the last sex you had before learning you were pregnant was June 29, that suggests something different than if you carried on having sex with your boyfriend after June 29.)
- You then had a later ultrasound (unfortunately, too late to use to reliably suggest when you conceived) but the doctor also remeasured the early ultrasound, and from that she came up with a due date of March 22, which suggests a conception date of June 29.

Unfortunately, neither projected conception date (June 29 nor July 5) is June 21, when you last mentioned having had sex with your boyfriend. Sperm from June 21 would not have lasted until June 29. On the other hand, perhaps you had other sexual events with your boyfriend in late June and early July?

An ultrasound in someone's 16th week is not precise enough to pinpoint conception exactly. Babies can grow faster or slower than the averages, and by the 12th week (let alone the 16th week), the baby can be more than a week off the average size, meaning there is no such thing as being able to pinpoint a conception date down to the day or even to the week, from a 16th-week ultrasound.

The fact that you didn't have a period at the end of June could be suggestive, except that you took Plan B in March and say it messes up your cycles. For how long does it mess up your cycles? You said you had a period in late May. Would you think your next period would have been due in June given the period in May, or do you think your cycles might have continued to be influenced by the Plan B you took in March?

If you think your June period should have absolutely come 28 days after your period in May despite taking Plan B in March, then perhaps it being absent by June 29 is useful information. (And the fact that the best of the dates suggested by your doctor said conception was around June 29 could just be ignored as being within the margin for error, given that she was working from a 16th-week ultrasound.) But that's a lot of "ifs." There is also the possibility that the pregnancy place you went to in your 6th or 7th week got the due date right, since that was in the better time frame for using ultrasounds to determine conception dates. Which would mean you got pregnant as late as July 5.

I think you are going to have to come clean with the doctor about your problem, and tell her when all the sex was as close as possible to the exact dates as you can remember them. And tell her about the times you took Plan B. (You'll just have to live with the lecture where she tells you that Plan B is not meant to be used regularly as birth control.) I would hope she could tell enough from your early ultrasound to be clear as possible on the conception date it suggests.

I should also mention in case you don't know -- there are a couple of good labs (and a lot of charlatans, so be careful where you go) that, for a hefty price, can do a blood draw from you and a swab from both men, and tell you before the baby comes who the dad is. If you do this, be sure to go to only either Ravgen or the DDC, and to test with both men. The cost is ten times the price of a DNA test after the baby comes, but for some women it is worth it.



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134578 tn?1483549754
Just because I wrote June 29 instead of June 26 when talking about when the sex with your ex was, here is a corrected recap.

If you did conceive on June 29 -- (and that info needs to come from your ob/gyn, not from you taking something the ob/gyn said and making calculations yourself and coming to that conclusion) -- the sex with the guy on June 26 would be the most likely to have produced the baby. June 21 sex with your boyfriend is too early for sperm to make it all the way to June 29, but sex with the ex was in the correct time frame.

But, if the original, early ultrasound was correct, (6th or 7th week ultrasounds are usually more correct for this kind of determination than later ultrasounds -- by week 40, they can be 3 weeks off) you would have conceived later than June 29, more like around July 5.

The thing to do is ask your ob/gyn very specifically why she has told you the original ultrasound came to a wrong conclusion. If she is correct and you are due March 22, the situation seems serious in regard to your boyfriend not being the dad but the ex being the dad. If there is a possibility the first ultrasound you had was correct, then the question is, did you have sex with anyone between June 26 and July 5 besides your ex? If so, when?

And finally, if you spring for the big bucks for a test with Ravgen or the DDC, or only test once the baby is born, be absolutely sure to test with both guys.There are ways to do a surreptitious test if you cannot bring yourself to tell your boyfriend, but if you only test with one guy and get a negative, many women have trouble believing the test. Testing with both guys, one person's positive confirms the other person's negative.

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That makes perfect sense. I have no idea why my doctor would change my due date either. I had that first sonogram when I was in the very beginning of the pregnancy. So early that they kind of doubted that we could see any baby. I actually did have unprotected sex with my boyfriend July 4th!
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I had went to get a sonogram at pregnancy lifeline exactly July 25. They said I was 5 weeks pregnant and my due date was march 28. Before they even did the ultrasound they were telling me that we might not be able to see anything but we did! They also had told me I must have conceived around June 29- July 5! I actually had unprotected and he did *** inside of me with my boyfriend July 4th and July 5th. I'm assuming I didn't get a period June because I had token that plan b June 27/28. Does this make anymore sense? The whole reason I was going by dates of June 21 and June 26 which are they other 2 dates I had sex is because my doctor (OBGYN) suddenly said I'm 18 weeks. So me, I was thinking I was already pregnant by July 3-4-5. Like I said I have my appointment Nov 1 so I will ask why she suddenly changed my due date and maybe that will clarify if I still need to go by the date June 26 with ex boyfriend or if I'm lucky I actually got pregnant July 4-5 with my boyfriend.
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134578 tn?1483549754
I think that it will probably take a DNA test to clear it up in the end, either a prenatal test or a post-natal one, but it is not fair to leave the issue up in the air. Especially unfair to your child, but also to both guys.

It sounds like if you went with the pregnancy center's information, your boyfriend could be the dad from the July 4 or 5 sex, but if you go with your doctor's count the other guy could be the dad, and this might get you to the point where when you ask your doctor it's just going to be he medical professional versus the pregnancy center. Does your doctor know why it is so important for you to get this clear? Does your boyfriend know there might be a question? Does the boyfriend come to all your appointments? In your shoes, I would be really tempted to do the DNA test before the baby comes desipite the high cost, just so you and the men know for sure.
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I'm too embarrassed and ashamed of myself to even talk to this situation to anyone. I don't know how I will ever come clean to my boyfriend. In all honesty, do you think it's my boyfriends or my ex? I actually told my ex last night when you told me 2th matches w his date and not my boyfriends. I'm so embarrassed and idk how I could ever come up with money like that for a DNA test...
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Is there anyway I can call you?
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134578 tn?1483549754
I can give you as much help here on the site as I could on the phone. We also have private messaging on this website: if you need to send something that you feel will identify you or the situation too much, you can use it. Try to rethink whether you can find the money to do a prenatal test. (But remember, stick with Ravgen or the DDC -- there are Internet-advertised cheapie so-called "labs" out there that are NOT worth the money they willingly take from worried victims.) If your ex wants to know badly enough, he might be willing to split the cost with you.

Absent that possibility, the only thing you can do (besides wait and test after the baby is born, for a tenth of the cost of a prenatal test) is throw yourself on the mercy of the doctor and tell her the whole thing, dates and all, and get her to take super seriously your strong need to know when you might have conceived. Someone looking at the baby's crown-to-rump data and other developmental markers from your first ultrasound is the best one to advise you.
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134578 tn?1483549754
You might also go back and ask them at pregnancy lifeline to show you by the baby's measurements how they came to the conclusion that your due date was March 28.
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I actually called pregnancy lifeline yesterday and they weren't cooperative at all. All the said was I was 8 weeks and 1 day on July 25. I'm just going to take a DNA test immediately after the baby is born.. thank you for all your help. Truly means a lot!!
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134578 tn?1483549754
Are you sure they said that you were 8 weeks 1 day on July 25? By telling you that your due date was March 28, they were saying you conceived on July 5, and that is too close to July 25 for them to have said you were 8 weeks 1 day. Could you have remembered any part of what they said, wrongly? (Either your due date or your weeks?) Do you have a written record from them from the time you were there, that says a due date and a weeks-GA figure?
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I have the sonogram and it says 8 weeks and 1 day like she said yesterday and on the paper it says due march 28 2018. So most likely the due date they gave me was incorrect cause I relooked at the sono and it says 8wk 1 day...
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That is probably why my doctor changed my due date..
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134578 tn?1483549754
Does it give a measurement for the embryo, crown to rump?
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134578 tn?1483549754
What was the date of the sonogram?
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Where can I find the measurements? And the date was 07/25/2017
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It says
GA=08w1d 6.3cm/ 2.3 / 6hz Tib 1.0 07/25/17
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134578 tn?1483549754
So the due date is not on the face of the sonogram?
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134578 tn?1483549754
One piece of information has to be wrong in what you had, since the due date and the GA do not correspond. The GA (which is the weeks since the first day of your last period) seems accurate as far as you can remember, and the date of the sonogram is written on it, and the 6.3 cm is clearly noted, the part that doesn't seem like it can be correct is if they told you that you were due on the 28th of March. Did they tell you that verbally and you simply remembered it? Is it printed anywhere on the sonogram record?
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Nope I don't see a date. I wish I could send a picture of it
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I have a paper which I'm searching for right now is that proof of pregnancy form and it dated due March 28
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134578 tn?1483549754
If the ultrasound date is July 25, gettting a 6.3 cm measurement on that day suggests conception would have been around the 17th of June. If the 8w1d notation is correct, it would suggest conception would have been around the 12th of June. Neither conception on June 12 nor 17 suggests a due date of March 28, they suggest March 5 and March 10. Did they just tell you a date and you wrote it down later, or do you think you have a written document from them actually saying March 28?

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I am sorry but something is clearly messed up here with the US report. 8w1d would mean about 1,6 cm+/-2-3mm (CRL) a 6,3 cm CRL would indicate a 12w4d (+/-4-6days), 6,3cm gestational sac can be excluded as this measurement is in general not used over 50mm, LMP day as May 29 is also problematic it just does not match with other data (plan B on the 27 of June:  no influence at all on the length of the period resulted in pregnancy). I am afraid that only DNA test can provide a clear answer, based on the known data the probability of paternity can't be given. Again, I am sorry to say.  
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I think everything pregnancy lifeline gave me was half *** because she even said they might have been off a "hair", "go by whatever your doctor tells you". They weren't really cooperative. My due date is apparently now March 22, 2018. I had sex w boyfriend 21st of June and had sex w guy 2 June 26. Took a plan B June 27-28. (What is crazy if the plan b didn't work is I've token a plan b before and they've always worked. They usually push my periods further meaning sometimes I wouldn't get one or it'll be late.) I also had sex w boyfriend July 3-4-5 th. And it stayed boyfriend from then on. I just had sex w my guy 2 June 26 and immidiately took a plan B June 27-28. Last time I remember being on my period was may 29. I didn't get a period june and I assume because I took that plan b. In fact before I even took that plan b pill on June 27 I took a pregnancy test to be sure I'm not already pregnant from my boyfriend before I go and buy a 50$ pill. And it came out negative.
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134578 tn?1483549754
Well, go to your November appointment alone and talk it over in depth with your doctor. (Incidentally, the pregnancy test on June 26? 27? would not eliminate the sex with the boyfriend from June 21, since pregnancy tests don't register that soon. But it would have caught a pregnancy that was from earlier than, say, June 15.) Bring in a calendar on which you have marked the sex with each guy and a page where you note the due dates and their possible conception dates, and then ask the doc if any answers are possible. If your new ultrasound (the one at the November appointment) also suggests conception on the 22nd and not the 28th, that might help because it would suggest the baby is staying within the average range (meaning the date could be a little more trusted, even if the ultrasound is this late in your pregnancy.) Talk it over with your doc.
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