I would recommend dealing with your self confidence issue by talk therapy, and if you can increase your self esteem, your focus will follow..it can be done, since low self esteem is the product of self talk...the critical self talking to you...and you can learn to talk back...try it.
Thanks for responding.
The "under power" is mainly in the top portion of the brain (Cingulate), with some "under power" in the Frontal Lobes. I have not asked about a stimulator such as Ritalin. I will at my next visit and I thank-you for your suggestion. This condition is very frustrating to the mind. Thanks again.
By "top portion of my brain" are you referring to your frontal lobe? If you are then yes, decreased brain power in the frontal lobe can cause problems such as little focus and problems absorbing information.
Now I could not have all my information correct but the frontal lobe is the center for higher thought processes, such as abstract reasoning, or, in your case, problem solving and information absorption.
As far as having OCD, that's like having a broken record in your brain so it can affect other processes detrimentally. Again, in this case it would be your focus and information rates that are suffering.
Personally, I would suggest seeing a regular therapist to help with a lot of what you seem be going through. Also, have you suggested or has your psychiatrist suggested a stimulator of some sort? By that I mean something that would help your neurons fire more quickly. Such as Adderall, Focalin, Ritalin... etc. Any sort of ADD inattentive medication.
Good luck with your life. I hope things go well.