Sorry to post this so soon after another question, but its another 4 weeks until I see my PDoc so wanted some advice. My main fear is that I have schizophrenia, and I know that being paranoid can be a part of this...so here is my symptoms.
Recently at work or home, if I am making a coffee or cup of tea, and I use someone elses milk (Steal in a sense!) for a moment I worry about the possibility that perhaps someone 'may' of put LSD (Or a drug) in it. Or done something untoward to it to ward off other people using it...I realize this is silly and sounds irrational...
Taking LSD/Drugs is one of my biggest fears, I know that the thought is totally irrational, and that no one should or would do this, but it still instills me with instant fear.
I will still use the milk (Or item in question) but just the thought entering my mind,causes it to stay for a while, and causes me a lot of distress, as I then assume I am being very paranoid and thus display a classic symptom of potential Schizophrenia? I should I add I don't believe anyone is out to get me etc, but I do massively over worry- for instance if I sleep with someone I will be convinced I may have HIV (Until tested), or the other night some random stranger was sleeping outside in a car - and I was quite worried in-case he was some stranger that might break in etc. Also one of my friends from martial arts who I normally attend with, stopped talking to me for a few days (Turns out because he was extremely busy)...after dwelling for some time I thought it could be because he thought I was a ********* - we both go to karate - and lots of children attend, and I thought for some reason he may think I was...I'd like to add I definitely am NOT (Aged 31 in a stable relationship), and 100% did nothing to make any person think that I was, and again I knew it was irrational and silly - but could not shake the hugely upsetting thought!
Please any thoughts on this? Is this paranoia or intrusive thoughts?
What you have described here appears to be neither Paranoia (of the Schizophrenia type) nor instrusive thoughts.
Being suspicious that someone might have mixed LSD in the milk is more of an anxiety / fear than paranoia. And this is because you probably have intense emotions associated with LSD, based on some underlying beliefs about taking drugs. These beliefs are probably irrational, leading to the fear you have of drugs. This can manifest in any situation, such as the milk incidence.
Similarly fears stemming from certain core beliefs (probably irrational) about various other areas of life, are manifesting in various forms, such as the fear of sufering from Schizophrenia, contracting HIV, etc.
Overall, your emotional disturbances and feelings are not paranoia. And these are not intrusive thoughts, per se. Intrusive thoughts are usually involuntary. Your thoughts here appear to have triggers. Each of the examples you have described here includes thoughts that were triggered by an event, such as "assuming you are being very paranoid". This assumption / inference acts as an activating event for the chain of thoughts like - "I am being paranoid, means I might have schizophrenia ... which is very bad" and so on. These thoughts in turn bring out the emotional consequences you expereince as anxiety.
Your symptoms do not suggest Schizophrenia or psychosis, but you might have to consider therapy for further exploration of the core thoughts and beliefs about imporatnat areas of life. Modifying any irrational beliefs into rational ones can help you in the long run. What it means is you will not disturb yourself so much even if the triggers / activating events stay the same.
Your symptoms seem to be part of the anxiety spectrum which includes generalized anxiety disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder. If you can identify where the anxiety is coming from, you can take proactive steps towards minimizing or eliminating the causes. Therapy can help you with that.
I also would like to thank you, as I also have very similar thought patterns (both the worry of the initial incident (especially the HIV thing) and the following "am I crazy for being this worried about this?") and it's very reassuring to see someone else doing the same thing and that neither they nor I are schizophrenic as a result.
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