Talking to a 5 year old about death & dying

Hello, We have had to deal with several deaths recently and I would like to what is appropriate so share with my 5 year old son, who is full of questions. I try to be honest with his direct inquiries but he is asking for more and more detail.

Over the last two years we had to euthanize two dogs, and rather than telling my son (he was 3 & 4 at those times) that the dogs just went away, we did tell him very simply that the dogs were old and that their bodies (kidney, heart) had stopped working, that they

[Roger Gould, M.D.]

this is not disjointed, a very cogent and real issue.  I think you are doing everything right so far, which is to respond to his questions without scaring him. Once children are curious like this it is better to have an explanation than let them make up their own, which will be much scarier. It's also reassuring that you will listen and respond, showing you are not afraid of the subject. But as much as possible you want to protect him from too much death in his face, so you'll have to think more re the funeral coming up, and how to handle that.

[John Paul II]

My father died 8 months ago.  My wife and I talked to our 5 year old daughter about it in the most natural way.  We mention that grandpa was sick and that now he was happy and in a better place wiht God (yes, we are Christians).  My daughter when she gets mad tells us that she wants to die.  Is it normal for kids to feel like dying or is it that the picture that we painted of death and heaven has become nicer than to suffer her parents asking her to eat her greens and to clean her room.