About 5 months ago I was taken off seroquel because of these jerks I was having(self-diagnosis myoclunus, intermittent single jerks, multifocal drug-induced). I'm 36 and have been on antipsychotics since I was 18, not for hearing voices or seeing things, but for some delusional thinking and misperceptions of what is going on around me, for a really bad state of mental confusion, and for feeling strangely alone and disconnected(but medication has never done a whole lot for this last one). After getting off seroquel the spasms immediately stopped, but I had severe insomnia for months, trying many different sedatives without success. My lamictal dose was raised to take the place of seroquel. I think I've all these months been in maybe the "mixed state" of bipolar. Finally went back on seroquel (very low dose) w/ cogentin, and off lamictal,and am finally sleeping. I was put on depakote (which I was on long term a few years back and taken off of when diagnosis was changed from bipolar to schizoaffective). I started back on a low dose of wellbutrin too, to counteract the weightgain of depakote, but when I did that I started having little spasms again. Also, I've been depressed and still irritable and criticizing myself over every little thing...etc.. and anxiety that I think maybe the wellbutrin has made worse. I'm not sure that I've been on the depakote long enough for it to have its full affect, but from past experience I am severely depressed without being also on an anti-depressant. Another problem is that both the seroquel and depakote cause short-term memory loss for me. I noticed it right away when I was put back on the seroquel and it's much worse now with the depakote - I'm constantly forgetting what I'm saying mid-sentence, which makes me very anxious - I recite my comments over and over and still mess up.
I moved and had to switch doctors about a year ago, and it has been very hard because my previous doctor really knew me and at that time if my meds. weren't right I was suicidal and hospitalized, and with the daily monitoring, my medication could be made right again much faster.With a really wonderful husband, despite all the **** inside my head, I don't get suicidal any more. The reason why I am asking for help here is that my husband and I are planning a very long hike and we are leaving March 1st, so I'm in a hurry to get things straight!
Thank you for any advice you can give.