i feel that it would be better if i would be dead

I am 20 years old.Every body keeps telling me to solve my problems,emotional problems by going to therapy,i hate them,they do not know how i feel.I want to die to finally get some relief.I know you will say suicide is not a solution but i just can not take it anymore.My father abuse our familly verbally very often.I am feeling feeling nervous,iritated,stressed.i feel sorry for myself,for my mother ,i feel like crying,like something is going to explode.I am haunted by images when people tell me tha i should go to therapy,it drives me crazy,it makes feel so bad when i hear this.I do not want to discuss about anything,because i only feel worse.I just want to be me again.I hope with all my heart that i may have something like a virus,or thyroid problems wich cause this state and to treat it and be normal again.My psichiatrist prescribed me zoloft.I have this moments when i want to request something to someone when i actually get stuck,

[Roger Gould, M.D.]

Jaquta has already given you excellent advice...you should follow it.but also , think about therapy in a different way...it is a way to look for solutions, not to label you or just talk.  You need to look for solutions to your father, and for your family, and for yourself.....be sure and tell your psychiatrist how desparate you are, and you have thoughts of suicide..he or she can help you so take advantage of that...don't look at help as something that hurts you or makes you feel worse..

[Jaquta]

No, nobody can know specifically how you feel, or how I feel, or how others feel.
I think many people fail to understand how deeply some people can hurt and hurt on a regular basis.
I read yesterday that thoughts of suicide can occur when we perceive we don't have the resources to cope.  That perceived imbalance can make us feel more vulnerable.

I think that people have given you the best advice and that is to seek professional help.
I think that people will often invalidate our feelings and experiences because they have no concept of what it is like, or could be like.
I think you need to find a good psychotherapist though, one who you feel you can relate too.  Someone who you can trust and work with.
Talking can be difficult and can sometimes feel to make things worse but keeping things bottled away doesn't help either.  It is unhealthy plus guarantees that nothing will change.

I don't think you have a virus.  I think you have emotional problems.

I think you should discuss your feelings with your psychiatrist and go to therapy.
I think it takes a lot of courage to go to therapy and to talk about sensitive issues that can leave you feeling vulnerable.  Therapy is rarely easy (although it is made easier with a good therapist).

Dr Gould has a website (myvirtualshrink.com) which could be beneficial.  I don't think it should replace professional help though.