what do i do

hello Dr,
I am 28 yrs and in college. I find myself not concentrating in class or when studying. sometimes, I study and I don't even remember what I had just studied. is there something wrong with me? do I need to talk to someone about this problem?

[Roger Gould, M.D.]

You can talk to your school counselor who can advise you and help get this diagnosed properly...for sure, your mind is " somewhere else", so you are having some trouble keeping your problems out of your mind...you should change strategies...i.e. face your problems and find solutions...that will relieve the pressure and allow you to concentrate on your studies...check out my new site for help...www.myvirtualshrink.com...

[Jaquta]

I guess confronting the problem is good advice.  I think sometimes it can be difficult identifying exactly what the problem is.  Sometimes it feels like one thing but is actually another.
This response has been helpful for me looking at issues in my own life.  It explains why I have felt shut down and have done minimal work over the past two and a half months. :(  And why my concentration has been marginal.
Free sessions on your programs always look inviting, but ... I don't trust that they won't disadvantage me financially in some way.  Isn't that what usually happens?
I read the rather extensive list of terms and conditions (which one does need to be able to concentrate for) but then chickened out.
You seem like an honorable person and one who means well but ...
Are your programs really that easy to access?
I possibly shouldn't feel stint for taking advantage of something that has been made available to everyone (regardless of my intentions) but I do.  :(

[JP2R]

Hi -

I read your post about concentration - and your comments to Dr. Gould. I'm no doctor, but I do have a problem with concentration (among other 'issues' *smile).

I agree with Dr. Gould and you - that to confront the problem is a good start. I also agree that often it's tough to pinpoint the direct causes...(we all are much better at avoidance than dealing with things directly, eh?).

To me, I have this analogy - it's sort of like recognizing that your car has a leak somewhere - Your brain observes the drainage and thinks, "Okay, I'm losing a fluid" and you crawl under the vehicle and look to see if it's water, anti-freeze, oil, whatever...and when you get down there under the car you find out - "Okay, cool, so it's "X" [whatever "X" maybe]" - but you have to trace it back - It can't be assumed to be leaking from that spot - mostly it's coming from somewhere else...so a good mechanic will follow the trail back....

Of course - like I said, I'm no doctor - but that's what helps to isolate the causes...of what's "leaking"...

I have to deal with things like depression - I'm taking meds for anxiety, OCD, and depression - they are all inter-related [for me at least] - One will trigger the other...so this is why I understand the lack of concentration - the feeling of lazy and tired - and it cycles...

It's like my friend Jane tells me - when I ask her why she's crying - her crying gets worse...because She's crying because she's crying because she's crying...does that make sense...

So - after all that 'blah' I just wrote - a solution? Um...

1. Keep a journal [you might even want to pay attention to what you dream about] that way you can see trends in your behavior that may lead you to a clue...

2. Keep up your health - if you feel like "Man, I could seriously use a drink" - although drinking isn't bad - that sort of thought might be causing you to rely on something that is not conducive to identifying the problem - or achieving a solution.

Try going on a walk and 'let your brain walk' - or if you're into running - do that...

3. If you are in school [college or whatever] see a guidance counselor - they really can help - and might be able to inform you of where you can go to talk with someone...or plot out a course of action...

If you're in the workforce - many employers [especially now] have things set up so that you can call a Hot Line and they can direct you to where you can connect with someone...

This place is a great place to start and look for ideas and direction - but nothing beats face-to-face - and actual medical assessment of  what's up... Our brains are powerful things...

I hope this helped some...
-- J

[Jaquta]

Hi J

Thanks for your comments.  They are certainly enlightening and reinforce a lot of what has been said (numerous times) before.  I seem to overlook the fact that the fundamentals still remain the same regardless.  It's good to be reminded.

Who doesn't have other issues?

I have become especially talented at avoidance.  That's not a skill I want to add to my CV though.  Why don't they teach us this stuff at school?  Not the avoidance but the problem solving.
For me, identifying the cause is like selecting the right pick up stick (or like trying to find the proverbial needle in the haystack).

It's a good analogy.  (I like analogies.  I find them particularly good for learning.)
I've been driving my brother's car while he's on his OE.  It has had an oil leak.  Initially the 'oil' warning light came on.  Probably similar to early warning signs in us.  Being a woman and not being too cognizant about cars and their engines I filled it up with oil.
Next day I saw a huge patch of oil on mum's and dad's new pavers.  Not a good sign.
Well after driving it around for a few more weeks and nearing its warrant of fitness date I decide to get the mechanic (who is conveniently our neighbor) to look at it.  He repairs it.  Fantastic.  Later though it now has another oil leak.  :(
Is it the same leak?  Did the mechanic not fix it properly in the first place?  Is it a new leak?
Life can sometimes feel as complicated as a car.  If only it were as simple as them having four wheels and getting us from A to B safely.

Speaking about cars, I wonder how they compare to therapy.
A while back I accidentally put a hole in the tyre of our farm bike.  The neighbor does tyres too.  Initially he put a patch on it.  Later it was still deflating so he then put a tube in it.  I wonder how much therapy changes us to make us functional?

Do you think we need to do behavioral chain analyzes to find that cause?

Anyone of those disorders could affect or result in a lack of concentration.
I think you understand it well and it's reassuring to know I'm not the only one who struggles with it (or is frustrated or affected by it).

It does make sense.
Sometimes I think having someone empathize with us sets it off as well.  Sometimes when my GP shows me compassion or understanding the tears start to flow.  Sometimes it's easier when we don't allow them through our defenses.  (Avoidance again!)

I don't have the patience to journal.  Also my parents gave doctors my diaries when I was in hospital so I don't have the desire to write.
Do dreams count if they're affected by sleep medication?  A while back I was taking sleep meds and to be honest I have no idea of what was real and what wasn't.
Maybe confusion was something to journal about.

During the last two weeks I have crashed a bit and that has included drinking (more caffeine) and eating practically non-stop.
I hear what you're saying.  Dr Gould often says it too.
OK, so no more self-medicating with food or tea.
I haven't exercised for two weeks either.  I was looking at a marathon training program today.  That could be motivating enough to at least get me out the door.
My family have this expectation that I'll spend all day digging dirt for our front lawn.
I usually love digging -just not recently.  OK, so I'll go do that too.  In the rain.

I'm suppose to be receiving support through the local mhs.  Emphasis on the suppose to be.  My GP's been advocating on my behalf for more support.  The mhs seem better at avoiding and procrastinating than most people.
Maybe by the time I reach retirement age they would have sorted it out.  Is 40 years long enough?  Perhaps not.  I don't have any confidence in them or their service anymore.  It's a major problem.

Therapy is the best way forward but I don't have access to that support at the moment.

Our brains are extremely powerful.

It has helped a lot -thanks!  And thanks for sharing.
More action, less talk.

[JP2R]

Hi Jaquta -

I believe you're right - from time to time we need to connect with someone and be reminded
of the fundamentals. It's not like we would forget - but it's more like a 'tag-up' to the
base...

The are days, weeks, even months that I can say that I was just 'chuggin' along' maintaining
and then out of the blue (well, it seems that way) - something triggers off - and I have to
reset...

I have to be honest - it's a daily thing for me - working on concentrating, finishing tasks...
and it gets pretty annoying...and hard not to lose confidence in yourself...

OCD is a coping (spelling) mechanism - I've very OCD - and have created a process to complete
things - it sometimes makes it hard to work though in some types of jobs.

I make lists to keep on track - (smile) - so I'm surrounded by lists all over the place.

As far as the leaaking car - Ha - I couldn't tell you about how to fix that (smile).

I'm not sure what area you live in - but I do know that there are provisions for those who
can't afford a therapist. I go to a clinic that works on a sliding scale and they have
always helped me to located someone that I could talk to...

The thing I have the hardest time doing - is when I get to the office - I don't know what
to say - and I find it hard to not just 'talk' - and I totally avoid picking up on what
I need to deal with...bad...bad...Jae

I've been in groups as well and even there - if not listening to the conversations -
pushed to talk it will be something more surface than dealing with the problem.

As for the journaling - and writing things down to get it out - I can totally understand
how you feel about the violation of privacy - I haven't figured out where I need to keep
my writings - digital or book - notepad or whatnot...but I still feel that writing it
out might be helpful...especially if there is no one to talk to...

[Jaquta]

Hi J.  Thanks for taking the time to respond.  I did reply earlier but for some reason it didn't come through.  Maybe because I stopped submitting because the line had been disconnected.  (I was waiting for my T to call.)
I would usually take the time to rewrite my post but ... I am actually struggling a bit tonight.  My GP said that in order to get help I would need to hurt myself.
I didn't need inciting when I'm already struggling with thoughts, etc.

You sound like you are managing your disorder OK.  I understand how challenging it can be.  Really hard not to lose that confidence especially if you compare yourself to others without issues.  It's equally frustrating when that understanding isn't there and people take the ease with which they do stuff for granted.
Lists sound reasonable if they help you to cope.  What I found useful was exposing myself to situations I found stressful and not doing the behavior.  It happened by chance initially, where I didn't have the opportunity to complete rituals.  I felt that if I could manage (cope, survive) this one time then perhaps I could extend it to other areas where I was being significantly affected.  It's helped a lot.

Maybe you could come up with some strategies for work -especially for your arrival.
You must have some ideas about things that could potentially help you.
Usually we have solutions just not the skill to initiate/ utilize them.

I'm sorry this is a mess (I keep being interrupted) and it definitely differs to my original post.

Regarding the journal -put it somewhere safe and accessible.