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Anger

I am a 36 year old male and I have extreme mood swings of anger.  Overall I am a good husband, father, and friend, but at times I get angry for no reason and my mood makes me hard to deal with.  I get angry with my wife and children and do and say things I regret (all verbal NOT PHYSICAL).  I hate feeling this way and have tremendous regret after each episode.  What can I do???  HELP ME PLEASE!
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Avatar universal
So far you seem to be focused on what kinds of pills you and your husband can take to enable the both of you to continue your unhappy relationship. I think you may be missing the very real damage his behavior and this relationship is doing to you and your children. Its the behavior that needs to change, and that means behavioral therapy, probably for both of you. I realize you may feel you are trapped in an economic relationship with this man, but I urge you to seek outside help from a professional.
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I am experiencing the same problem but on the receiving end and it has and is affected me physically.  I have always had a anxiety disorder.  My husband has increasingly in the last year or so become so verbally violent and short fused that it throws me into a immediate attack.  We run our own business (agriculture) and there are many stressful times.  But if I or our kids seem to make the slightest mistake and things just don't go perfect (which they never do) he blows sky high, says terrible things that he apologizes for later and feels very bad. But in the mean time it makes me physically sick and drives a wedge between our son and him. This is a man who I don't think would ever try a therapist.  But do you think if I can get him to go to the doctor and try something (medication) that we are heading down the right path?  I am on Lexapro and have had to double it in the last year to cope with him.  Also I have Xanax if I need it.  I just am at a lost.  The thing I don't like about the medications is that it can take several different ones before you hit on the right one (I know from experience).  Is there a specific doctor to go to other then a general physician?
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205230 tn?1237405193
I had anger management issues stemmed by situational/ events in my life.  I hated everyone and was very mean to the ones I loved as well.  It was a terrible time and if it weren't for my amazing therapist!!!!  I would probably not be married right now if it wasn't for her.  I was on Xanax but only took it when I felt like I was about to rage.  Sometimes, my then boyfriend/ now husband would suggest (using the words we agreed on in therapy) to take it and I would.  I would calm down in my own space  (bedroom) & come out when I was ready to communicate "in my adult".   Anger is an easier way to cope with other issues I have been told.  You have to figure out what the other emotions are that you are masking but you have to be in a reflective mood in order to even think about that.  Therapy really helps if you find a good therapist!  I used to go 2 times a week and now I check in with her once every 6 months!  I am doing great.  That is not to say I don't have feelings of rage... I still do.  But I can control my actions (physical and VERBAL)  
By the way, all that verbal abuse you are dishing out is going to come back and haunt you if you don't start controling it.  Those who love you and are dealing with you may feel some resentment towards you for making them have to deal with it.  That is a whole other issue that therapy will help.  Meds can mask your anger and make you feel calm, but if you really want to learn how to deal with it, get some real help.  Good luck.
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Avatar universal
I pretty much have/had the same issues.  I have been on several antidepressants.  The weird thing is when I was on Wellbutrin it made my anger even worse.  I don't know why, it is the only antidepressant that had ever done that.  I'm now on Lexapro along with a mood stabilizer (forgot the name) and it has helped a lot.  I don't know if it is something to do with Wellbutrin that makes us with anger issues worse or what.  I thought it was just me.
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Avatar universal
I forgot to mention I am on Welburtrin SR, but it just doesn't seem to be cutting it.
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2 Comments
the wellbutrin may be flipping you into mania (episodes of irritability) if you're true diagnosis is bipolar and not just depression
Be careful of the different diagnoses u get.  If u weren't like this before u started taking meds then I bet it's the meds causing this.  If they start giving you Med cocktails (new combos of meds) be careful.  They can permanently change your brain chemistry and cause movement and pain disorders .  Get weaned off meds and just take crumbs of Valium
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