Any men over 30 experience anxiety, depression, & crying?

[brighterreality]

I am 34 years old and have dealt with anxiety and depression since I was 15.  I have done fairly well with it since I was 24 and really got some help.  I am currently on Paxil CR and Ambien.  
Lately, I have felt very alone and have had some crying spells.  I have never had crying spells before and have never felt this alone.  I feel like I am the only man who has a crying spell all of a sudden for no reason.  I am also always tired and lathargic.  Sometimes on my off day(s) I will stay in bed for 24 hrs.  Please help!
Are there any males over 30 that have dealt with any of these issues?  What have you found helpful?

[CPR777]

I am a 68 year old male. At 40, I suddenly developed depression (runs in the family) and I suddenly would go to bed and CRY! My disease is no longer treatable and I cry in private nearly every day.  I am not a wimp. Some men legitimately cry as part of their disease!  My wife has accused me of being nonmanly, but that is a myth!  SOME men cry as part of the disease, perhaps as a means to lessen anxiety.  Don't be apologetic!  That just prolongs the stigma people put on men with legitimate depression.
Depression hurts, but keep your pride!   PR, M.D.

[Ets123]

Your not alone.
Same trouble since 12.
Realy got bad at 30.
Six months later and me and the pshyc still trying to figure it out.
And for why does crying make you feel even worse. Makes me feel inferior.

[brianmcdonald]

I am 45 y/o male married with 3 children and feel the same as you. You are not alone.

[jrlexusman]

hey how are you feeing today??

[umya]

i honestly do, 100%.  i'd be curious to know what your psyshciatrist thnks of that suggestion.  perhaps you should run it by her.  i dont know if youre in a major city, but i do know that some psychiatrists also specialize in psychoanalysis and practice both.  the odds are you may find one in any city.  

[brighterreality]

Umya, that actually makes sense to me.  So, I am comfortable with my psychiatrist, but all she really does now is monitor my medication.  You think finding a good therapist is going be a big key at helping?

[umya]

yes, absolutely.  another word for worry could be obsess.  worries or obsessions are components of depressive or anxious illnesses or ocd of course.  this may be an over simplificiation but bear with me.  i learned that my obsessions were there to help keep me preoccupied constantly.  as crazy making as they were, they were clever defense mechanisms designed to keep me focused on unrealities rather than deal with the chronic awful realities of my then home life.  they are so "good" at taking half truths, conjectures or assumptions and completely convincing you that they are real.  it is important to understand when this is happening and try to ask why they may be turning up their volume at a particular time.  this can be difficult to do, i know, especially if they have become chronic.  discourse with my therapist was essential in breaking the grip of the obsessions.  not just by thaving them tell me to "stop worrying, or that's not true"  etc  but by digging deep into finding out what the baseless worrying was defending against which in my case were a number of emotional tangles.  this may or may not be true in your case (we're all different), only a good psychotherapist will be able to tell you.  they are conquerable though, just remember that.  all the best in 08.  

[brighterreality]

Venora and umya,
First, Happy New Year!  I hope 2008 is good for all of us.  I have another question...along with my other recent issues, I have noticed that I have excessive worry.  I worry about everything (i.e., work, things I should have done in the past, things I regret from the past, the future, finances, going back to school, distant family, etc.).  Have you ever had episodes of excessive worry and what did you do about it?

[umya]

not at all.  i hope you feel better soon!  best of luck in '08.

[brighterreality]

Thanks umya.  I appreciate your insights.

[umya]

you certainly aren't the only man who cries.  i'm sorry you're feeling so awful.  there are reasons why you're crying, you may just need some help finding a focus with them.  your fatigue, if not thyroid related, could be a symptom of a depressive episode.  it's arguably the most common symptom.  you may be having a depressive episode and should consider seeing your doctor and getting a referral to a psychotherapist.  a psychotherapist can help you find some of the root causes of this awfulness your experiencing.  i have dealt with all of what you mention and am so sorry you're in this place currently.  you dont deserve to feel this way, it;s okay to cry.  there are always reasons for it.  i found at my worst, keeping a journal of how i was feeling and writing it down, however dark it was, was very helpful.  even just writing stream of consciousness and nonsensically at times was helpful.  some very interesting reveals can happen on paper when we do that.  most helpful though was entering into a long term commitment with a good psychoanalyist.  my you feel better soon.  

[brighterreality]

Thanks Venora.  Its comforting to know their are people out there that actually care...  The dr. had my blood tested in Nov. to look for any unusual levels and everything was within limits.  I am at a loss now...  I have experienced ups and downs for years, but never have I felt like I do right now.  

[Venora Moonwind]

Get your thyroid checked It could be the reson for the tiredness and the crrying.     a malfunctioning thyroid will mimic depressiona dn make you feel bad.
Love Venora