Can you help me?

[nad284]

I know someone who I believe is suffering from depression... can you help me?

He has been with a woman for 5 yrs. They have a child who is nearly 2. He wants more children but isn't working etc. So she has said no. This has become a huge issue as he already has issues about not being able to get a job- he get's them but they are always temp (he has foreign qualifications, so he is often understimated). It is making him feel like he can't 'be a man'.

They're house is quite small so it is making him feel quite enclosed. He is noticing that his silbings don't have the greatest finances, but are still having children and 'living their lives'. As the eldest he feels like he isn't meeting certain goals he set himself. He even mentioned that not too long ago he contemplated suicide but didn't want people to know he couldn't 'handle' it.

He has lashed out at those around him several times quite recently also. He even borke several plates and injured his hand. He has said he spoke to a doctor to speak about depression but doesn't want to labelled as 'a nut job' so it seems he may be having second thoughts.

What are your thoughts? Thanks in advance

[ParamedFlorena]

One can't forget that life really gives. Sometimes it is more difficult to see the joy when life goes on and on with a majority of things to deal with. A country's standards for education is not something we can do much about. The government sets those standards for to make it an offer of quality and safety.

If I'm educated to draw a bloodtest in Sweden that doesn't mean that's what the group of professional I fall into in Norway actually do.

Stress is horrible when it coems to who we are and want to be. It is never a shame to ask for guidance in life, by professionals who knows how to help in mental health and challenges. Intervention by psychologist would maybe be the best for ruling out a depression, and one doesn't need to have a depression to think that life offers many challenges either. It is when stress bites that the frustrations show in anger and irritation, and it is maybe there that the friends are great to have to say: "We see that you're struggling, can we help?"

Take good care and come back with updates!
Florena

[nad284]

Thank you for your reply. I keep trying to tell him be thankful for what he has. However, I'm sure with things feeling the way they do for him, there are only so many times he can say things are great,

[ParamedFlorena]

I don't think that it would be fair done of me to add in with any thoughts. Much can go on in a stride that never is told. But take my word: There is always a reason.
Stress, oh yes. I think of how it was to change countries and loose my own authorization - and 7 years later MAYBE pass on acute care? It has surely taken a toll on me.

I'm so glad he gets temporary jobs at least - why he doesn't keep them is a question of how fast he tires out (I knew after three months that I couldn't force myself to like a job).. Some might know a lot faster than me...

Here in Norway you need to know the language, follow up on a little bit of schooling to make sure you know the routines of what the title demands. Countries are so incredibly different from each other.

Take my education as an example... In Sweden I could be approved for kidney dialysis, on written allowance of course from a physician. In Norway I can't. I'm there to hold hands and spend time... Fun fun. There was no other way than to take the education required or move back. Some don't have that choice. It is a great deal of stress!
One makes a life out of what one has. A lot of pride goes the day one looses a title... I still have my swedish authorization hanging at the wall - auxilliary nurse, geriatrics and acute care, right next to the norwegian approval to work in geriatrics as an assistant. Fair enough! I can't push that without schooling.

I think I won't write any thing more here... Maybe it has given some ideas? We really can't change what life throws to us - but we can absolutely look at what we got, what we can get and what to do about it. I'm gad your friend has you. You are a very caring person!

Florena