My new therapist told me that things I thought that I couldn’t do were “choices” that I made. E.g. I was not able to attend my brother’s wedding because I was in the hospital being treated for a stroke, hooked up to lines including morphine for terrible head pain. I had been paralyzed on one side, could barely speak, and couldn’t think about anything but my excessive pain. I told her it wasn’t a “choice” that I decided not to go to my brother’s wedding. She said that it was. Was that to make me feel that I have more control in my life?
She also talked about being in the moment. She gave an example of holding an apple and thinking about all the hands that had handled the apple, from those picking it, transporting it, etc. I told her that was boring. I said so I’m supposed to only be in the moment cleaning up the kitchen and washing the dishes? I would rather be thinking of other things. She asked if that had worked for me. I said yes it had. Supposed to focus on eating which I now hate to eat since my stroke? I would rather focus on anything else other than the food that I hate but have to eat. If I really focus on the moment, I will focus on my constant pain from my fibromyalgia and migraines.
I have found that ignoring my pain as much as possible so that I can focus on what I really want to do has worked the best for me. And yes, I am “in the moment” when I am outside with focusing on all the various senses or being with my husband. But being in the moment as a general mechanism does not work for me.
And what I’ve found has worked the best is to focus on what is positive in my life. E.g. when I have cried about the little that I have been able to do, my husband has pointed out how much I have been able to accomplish over the last 4 years since my stroke, in spite of all my pain. That has really helped me.
I sincerely want to hear if anyone else has used these 2 techniques of “choice” and “being in the moment” to help with their pain and disabilities. And how? Maybe the therapist just didn’t describe them well to me. Another therapist was also going to focus on being in the moment.
Or what other methods have worked for people dealing with pain and/or disabilities?
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