Dont know where to turn

I have been to probably 8 different doctors in the last 10 years about my pain and mental health.

They have not found anything wrong other than my depression and put me on antidepressants.

Tried most antidepressants, currently on Wellbutrin and not seeing much of a change.

Had a gastric bypass 10 years ago and didnt do my follow ups.

In last YEAR I have gained 40 pounds.

I was living with my bf and his parents for a year and had little access to food and since moving into our own place I have food readily available and I know I'm using it as a drug but cant control myself. I also do not exercise because of the chronic pain in all my muscles. The doctors cannot find a reason for this and therefore dismiss it. I also have a huge fatigue problem. When I was 300 lbs 10 years ago things weren't this bad. I lost my job 4 yrs ago and havent been able to hold one since and am stuck depending on a man for support. Again, the drs think nothings wrong, its just depression. The pain and fatigue has progressed as the yrs have gone by.

I of course have no money of my own for a doctor and my bf will only pay for the low income clinic, which has a nurse practitioner who if it cant be found in a blood test...it cant be found... all they do there is blood tests.

I have been diagnosed with anemia and am on iron.

I need to see a specialist, I believe I could have fibro  but can't afford a specialist who believes in it.  Im at the point of just trying to get by until my life ends.

I dont get out but on the weekends with the bf and I dont have friends and my family was never really around. He's all I have.

The bf stopped drinking and the relationship got better but because hes having problems at his work with a coworker trying to get him fired, hes stressed which is making me stressed and now hes slowly drinking again. I cant go through that again.

That's where I am at now, waiting to die. I really dont have much hope.