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Feel detached

I been dealing with depression for about 5 months now, but recently my symptoms changed i feel really strange and have this detached feeling. Has any one expericenced this? If so what can i do to help stop this scary feeling.
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Avatar universal
I too have this feeling of detachment and anxiety. when i feel that way i feel sooo anxious and empty and i cry because i want to feel things again like love, happiness, excitement, goals for my future, etc. not just getting through each day. im not living, im just functioning. im just doing the daily things i need to do without anything actually havin real meaning to me. i want to feel everything, in every part off my body and soul and mind and have it all connected again like i used to! Some days the detachment is sooo bad i feel like im dying. i get so nervous and all i can do is sleep to make it stop. esp happens around my period. anyone else find that it happens worse at diff parts of menstrual cycle? Also do you guys feel really tired? head feel fuzzy? like all you can focus on is how you dont feel right and how your head just feels focused on it being fuzzy? i cant put any real emotion, thoughts, devotion to anything im doing, saying, etc because i am so distracted by this bizarre feeling. i feel like it also affects my eyes too. anyone else? like in a store esp. or driving. makes it worse. how about alcohol and hangovers? any one feel more detached then? i just want my life back and my old self. i used to be so care free, full of laughter, full of excitement, so curious and hopeful for the future, made plans, did things, thought critically, had dreams and goals that I would accomplish. now i just feel like i do what i need to do, but again with that emptiness inside. ugh : ( some days i feel 80% normal and thats great i love those days! But i want 100% again almost every day! I want a bad day to be rare, not a good day to be rare like things are now...
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Avatar universal
I have been through this and come out of it, and I hope what I have to tell you will be helpful. I'm not recommending everything I did to others, merely including it for completeness of understanding,

Firstly, in my younger days I was unhappy for a long time. Several things came at once - including losing my mum to cancer in the last year of university. On top of that I had been really miserable throughout my teens due to having zero success with women and having to watch others have all the fun, plus enduring their patronizing comments. It probably wasn't helped by a cannabis habit.

After a while, I used to sit with a pain of grief in my chest and think "switch off, do without emotions, it'll be better". But be careful what you wish for, you might get it. And so it was with the detachment, and the emptiness - it seemed to come on all of a sudden one night.

It was as if I wasn't experiencing life, only remembering it, if that makes sense. I felt I could have cut my own arm off and watched, disinterested, whilst it bled.

I learned by this that there are worse things than pain, I realised that I had shut it all out. I decided that I had to say to myself "anything is better than this, even the pain and the grief". I made a commitment to myself that I would be willing to accept the pain rather than the emptiness. The odd thing was I could forget it for a moment and laugh at a comedy program - then it would be smothered as I remembered I was empty. The lesson from that is that your feelings are still there, and part of what keeps them down is your anxiety to have them back,

Slowly it went away - I think summer helped, as I could get out into the open air and enjoy the sunshine.

I think this emptiness teaches us the importance of both reason and emotion in our mind - this state is like "numbed emotion", and you lack that feeling of significance, that thrill of recognition when you comprehend something and it resonates within you.

Now comes the interesting bit - and I'm not recommending this to anyone. About 10 months after the detachment began I had fought my way back to some of my normal feeling. I went out into a nightclub, and a friend gave me my first ecstacy tablet. Bang! I was back in the world, feeling a thrill of joy and confidence I'd never felt in my life  - in fact I never really understood the concept of confidence until then.

After that I was OK, even had a new lease of life for a bit. But my luck with women didn't improve, and due to ecstacy midweek blues I could feel very low in the week. But, importantly, I did feel things, I wasn't empty.

Only once again did I return to the empty state - and this was after I tried magic mushrooms (never, ever, ever again!!). It was as if everything was equally significant, and the world was an even shade of grey.

This time, however, it took me less than a week to get out of it. I watched a film which played Beethoven's 9th with an inspirational, motivational theme, and I thought "I am that person who feels, who believes in this contrast, I am not empty!".

I cried a few gentle tears of joy, and knew I was alive again.

My best advice is to try and find something that moves you, even gently, and weep a few tears. At first, it might seem like empty, flavourless crying - the term I used was "cardboard tears" but after a while you break through. Remember, though, you might have to face some terrible pain once you open the floodgates, because crying is something you have to do, not sit back and let happen to you.

But it is worth it, I swear!

Good luck to you all







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Avatar universal
Yeap, ive been through the dream like dimension...although ive just got it for the past few weeks, bt its scary, feels like ur trap in urself...people say its caused by depression...i could nver imagine depression could do this to me...bt hell it did...darn...it seems like it never goes away, but there are times i feel i can escape from it...so thrs hope..its hard to live in this condition, not just the feeling of detach from reality, it has this dizzy feeling with it as well...feels like we're floating...and thats annoying...but stay strong..this must be a test from god...have faith in him...there will be light! peace be with u all...
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384884 tn?1217319904
I'm currently going through moderate depression and severe anxiety. I spend most mornings feeling 80-100% detached from my surroundings. Afternoons are generally a bit less intense. I find it really hard to leave the house as I'm scared of facing people when I feel I'm not there. It's a really frightening feeling. It had eased a bit while I was in the care of the home intervention crisis team, but since being discharged last week the detachment is increasing again. I have weekly visits to my GP and am currently waiting for a programme to be put in place with the mental health unit at my local hospital. It's so important to get support from people who know this feeling, cos it sometimes feels like I'm gonna be like this forever. I'm on citalopram (cipramil) 60mg daily, which has helped ease my physical anxiety but may also make me feel more spaced out. It's like a vicious circle not knowing what to do.
My sleep is affected and I spent 3months on sleeping tablets (zopiclone 3.75) from october til now. I have come down gradually and take my last one on monday.
It's comforting to know I'm not alone in this, and helps confirm that actually I'm not going crazy, cos this is how it feels!!
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Avatar universal
do not think the classic "there are many in much worse position than me".  it's self-negating.  do not feel like an "idiot".  it sounds like youre in a difficult place right now.  i'm sorry, that's awful.  your feelings matter as much as anyone's either "better or worse off"  than you.   the reasons for depression are complicated, layered and very nuanced.  most people have no idea of the real reasons they end up depressed until in analysis.  you seem very bright and self aware and owe it to yourself to ask a councellor at school or your doctor to refer you to a psychiatrist/psychotherapist.  there is no shame in this and you have only to gain.  in fact, it takes more courage than any nay sayer has any clue about.  you're young, and most people ignore their emotional states and develop defensive techniques very early that carry them into their mid life when they then crack up for never having dealt with things properly.  ultimately they end up having led very compromised lives.  you on the other hand, have the chance to clear up your emotional life at a very young age and live a  life unencumbered by depression.  best of luck to you!  i hope you start to feel better soon.  
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Avatar universal
Hi, im 17 and male from UK. I am in my second year of A level studies and have always been quite intelligent, never academically excellent, but i always achieved well. Last year i did the teen rebellion thing and forgot my studies, choosing instead to socialize etc...It screwed up my life and i failed all my exams. My teachers said that they would allow me to carry on because they know im more than capable, but this year when i decided to get back on track and focus, everythings gone down hill, i cannot focus, i cannot sleep, when i do its usually at an inopportune moment and i never feel rested, and without realising ive become a virtual recluse I dont go out as much, im always grumpy. people dont want to even be around me because im not the same anymore, i can barely write a sentence unless it is dictated to me. Now, with weeks until my exams, im in a worse state than last year with no hope of passing. I have a feeling of living in a constant daydream, the closest thing i can relate it to is, when youre falling asleep and someone drags you back at that last second of consciousness which has grown over the year almost to a point of failure to function, all i can do is basic things but they hold no real meaning to me. I didnt want to go to the doctors because i keep thinking, why should i be depressed, there are many in much of a worse position than me, im scared to tell anyone how i feel face-to-face because i feel like an idiot for feeling like this but i dont know what to do anymore and i cant let it get any worse.
Can anyone say whether the reason is depression or what it might be?
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Avatar universal
*detached* sp :)
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Avatar universal
yes, i have felt this way before.  i used to describe it as detachted or as if observing everything through glass, or as simply "there but not there".  this is a very strange and unsettling sensation that i learned for me, was a dimension of chronic moderate to high anxiety and obsessive and (essentially defensive) preoccupations.  this feeling quietened down considerably then disappeared altogether after entering analysis and discovering the root causes of my depression/anxiety/obsessive thoughts.  it has apeared maybe twice in the past decade for a moment or two under stressful conditions.  i cannot recommend analysis enough.  may this pass quickly for you.  
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Avatar universal
Yes, I have recently gone through this problem as well. I devloped a somewhat severe depression disorder a few months ago; and since then, this feeling of being detached has been with me ever since. I have both kinds, though...the dream-like state, and the emotional detachment. It's hard...but over time, it goes away a little bit (at least it did for me).
-Jim
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Avatar universal
Yes, I have been through this as well.  Sometimes it feels like it may never go away!  Many times feelings like these are just a part of many changes (or things not changing) in your life.  If you wan to stay away from prescrip meds as I did there is a lot of good info on diet and lifestyle changes at this link that are helpful: http://www.jigsawhealth.com/articles/depression.html.  The best thing to do is to give yourself a little time at the end of each day to reflect or even meditate.  This will allow you to get in touch with yourself again.  Eventually you will come out of it naturally, just dont give up on yourself, it seems like that is so easy for people to do these days.  Good Luck!
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Avatar universal
Hi,
I have suffered from depression for over a year and a half and have felt 'detached' from real life quite a bit.
Sometimes life just seems to go by, and I have no feelings towards it, I just let it go.
I was involved in a really nasty accident, which I was very luck and walked away from it... though this surprised all the emergency services that came out to help... Now as this was after my depression started, my friends and family expected it to give me a 'kick up the backside' and to get back on track - but it didn't, I calmly got outta the car walked over to the other drive (who was drunk,ran a red light and was going at 70+ in a 30 zone) and checked he was ok...
I wasn't angry, or concerned about wot had just happened, and when my family seen the car there were tears all around... yet It made no difference to me in the way i felt or anything, it was as though i watched it from the outside....
My past few years has been like this alot, everyday things just don't seem real anymore, I have no love, lust or life left in me..

I am not in control of anything anymore - this could be my problem coz I'v always been a control freak!! And because I can't control things, I just let them happen and don't think about them..

This probably doesn't help u in anyway, but I'm just trying to show that I think I understand about being 'detached'

Take care
Jam
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Avatar universal
hello :)
just to help me understand more of your problem ,it could be one of 2 things :
is it a feeling of detatchment as in emotional like you are not loved, or u feel distanced from your friends and family,  the kind of feeling of being alone ?

or is it : a feeling of u feel like your living in a dream , like there is a glass shield or sumthing inbetween you and whats going on around you , like your there but feel in a haze.it pretty hard to explane.but this is called depersonalization/derealization , which is pretty common in alot of people suffering from some kind of depression,just not very herd of.if you search the net and find out about it. there are meds to help with this. im on prozac and after about 3 months my feeling of detatchment /dp/dr has almost gone away,and life is alot more bareable.

for both these problems there is help
let me know if this advise is any good to you.i am an expert on depersonalization/derealization :) and if u need more help im here

love sarah
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