Hi, Mixture of percribed anti-depressants

[Jamieww]

Hi all,
I am currently on the following medication:
Mirtazapine (15mg)
Risperidone (2mg x twice a day)
Venlafaxine (225mg)

My problem is I seem to be getting worse on a daily basis.
I have suffered from depression for about 1.5years (at least thats when I went to see my doctor) - probably a lot longer if I'm honest with myself.
I have no reason to be depressed, no financial worries, no traumatic events, no bad relationship - in fact my wife and kids have been fantastic and so has all my family & friends.

I always feel low and no longer have the energy or will to do anything.
I have contemplated suicide, made plans on how & where - but thinking about how it'll affect my kids stops me.
I have no self esteem, I no longer believe in myself and don't trust my instincts.
I regularly see a shrink and speak to my docs regularly.
I keep everything to myself, I can not speak about my feelings to friends or family.

My problem is that I am in a massive downward spiral, anything and everything is making me feel worse. I am back on the suicide path even though I know I am stronger than that...but I am concerned that I won't always be strong...
I am unsure if the mixture of drugs I am taking is really helping, has anyone else been on any of the above?? If so, how did they make u feel... better or worse??
I really just wanna stop them now, but I hear that there are nasty side effects and my doc isn't that keen on me stopping them...
Any personal or professional thoughts would b welcomed..

Thanks

Jam

[kalah]

I tried going off my meds a couple months ago and ended up in the hospital. Of course it didn't titrate off them like doctors recommend. Be careful!! I can't believe of all the drugs you are on...I haven't been on or heard of any of them. Do you have a dual diagnosis?

[venora]

Please go see a doctor or check yourself into the hospital That is what I had to do get on the road to recovery.I am bi polar and I crashed hard 3 different times and I swore never again.
Do you see a doc or therapist? They can really help especiallu the therapist.It helps so much to be able to talk to someone that is impartial and will give you honest feedback.
Know this you are loved and worthy to be loved. this is agood place to reach out for help.Anytime you want to talk know that I will listen.I understand very much what you are going through having been there myself.
Love Venora

[alkie]

Please seek professional help...whether it's counseling, seeing your family practitioner, or whatever...please talk to someone about the thoughts you're having.  Your family and friends would be devastated...there IS hope - And believe me, I (and I'm sure most others on this forum) understand your extreme lows.  You need to push through them and talk to someone.  If you hold all the problems and emotions inside, it makes things worse...it makes the lows more intense and more dangerous.  I haven't heard of your medications either...so I'm not sure what they all do, but talk to the doctor that prescribed them.  When someone is on anti-depressants, at some point, the thoughts of suicide may become more intense which is a side effect.  Good luck...don't be afraid to talk to someone.  Please let us know how you are doing.

[1 blue]

hang in there!  I have no reasons either and often feel like you do, almost.  It might be worth it to try finding a different specialist.  In my city there's a magazine that annually lists top docs in each category.  It sounds like you need someone with a lot of experience in your corner.  And if you are getting worse, imo the doc should have a longterm plan for you or things that would be your bottom line.  And I would think you may have reached it.  You are a valuable, loving person, even though you don't feel like it sometimes.  Your family does love and need you, too.  Keep looking for and finding answers.  hugs.