Is it really a chemical imbalance?

Has anyone else had major depression isssues for no real reason out of nowhere? My dr and therapist say mine is due to hormones and chemical imbalance and i'm having a hard time understanding it.. i get these horrible phases that pop up now and again that i just want to not be alive anymore, not be near anyone and not care about anything. Not in a suicidal way but even so it scares the crap out of me and it's worse than anything I've ever been through.

I'm on Bupoprion XL starting today after being on the SR since June but that was a whole other issue, my doctor thought i was getting xl but the prescription was going in wrong so i've been taking SR 12 hour release..  Hoping the 300MG of xl will help things but i'm not convinced...

[j17c27]

I have major depression and have had it since I was 12, and im 17 now.  It came for absolutly no reason! I haven't had a horrible past or anything too stressful, it just sort of hit me.  I started getting help after I started become suicidal..again for no reason! It is an imbalance of chemicals. My pychologist explained it this way: (she drew a picture so it may be harder for me to describe in words)

Your cells in your brain release certain chemicals (lets use seratonin as an example) and the releaseing of that is what makes you feel happy.  With depression, however, instead of the chemicals staying outside of the cells, they go back in, making the imbalance between the chemicals.  

Its really hard to explain without the picture...just I really didnt understand it either until my doctor explained it that way.  

[tara_p]

Thanks for the info, how have you delt with it? I want more than anything to rid myself of the thoughts I have about wanting to die etc..I want my old self back!

[j17c27]

I am still trying to figure out how to deal with it.  I used to be on 20 mg of Lexapro which was a disaster so about 3 weeks ago I switched to Pristiq ( I also suffer from extreme anxiety) and my anxiety got amazingly better but I still struggle with depression.  But i totally know what you mean about wanting your old self back! its unfair!
I suggest therapy with taking the medication.  The medication helps lessen the symptoms while the therapy helps build you back up to the person you want and need to be.

[narla]

I have been coping with anxiety,panic attacks and depression for 15 years,it started out of the blue,just hit me hard one day,I was at the cinemas with my daughter,nothing had happened.15 years later I'm still taking 200mg Zoloft every 6 months we try to see if I can take it down a bit but everything just starts all over again,I get very suicidal,I have a great life,no problems,great kids,great husband,been married 30 years,,but I can't function without medication,My doctor tells me not to feel weak because I'm on antidepressants,as she says if it was diabetes or cancer or any other illness I wouldn't worry about taking the meds so I now have come to realise I'll be on meds for the rest of my life.

[4Maddie44]

Same here.  Had depression for 20 years.  Now and again I stop medication, but depression always comes back out of the blue for no reason.  It is an illness.  Don't look for reasons, just accept it, like say asthmas, or high blood pressure, it is who you are.  It is a misconception there has to be a traumatic episode to trigger depression.

Like you say, a chemical imbalance.  

[tara_p]

thank you all! it's just hard to accept it when those awful feelings come into play, it's like i'm waiting for it to happen again. hoping my meds will work soon!

[narla]

When it happens to me I call it a feeling of doom,like something really horrible is going to happen and I'm just stood there waiting for the worst to engulf me.