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Maybe it is better to end it all?

Hello everyone, I am new here. It is Christmas, and I feel shxt. Feel lonely and hopeless about my future. And is thinking of suicide.

I just finish a film project at work, and now is working on a new very short and smaller project. Feel a lot of pressure and unhappy.

In the last film project, I do not do well. As I do not enjoy doing it. I want to break after that project, but there still follow ups to do.

I am not very good with friends, as before always think it is a waste of time gathering and communicate with them. Without contribution and initiative, there is not much good friends around me. Loneliness in additional to the unhappy at work, has made me very depressed, and feeling that there is no much thing to treasure in this world.

Tried alcohol and meditation to cure the depressed and suicidal thoughts that I have, but is not successful. Every time after drinking and meditation, I become more depressed and regret about wasting the time.

I am 31, looking around, my friends are making positive progress, but myself, was feel like stepping at the same spot without progression.

I know there are cognitive therapy can help with depression. Is there any place I can find the info about it.

I do not want to take medicine, as is worrying about the side effects of being slow and insensitive.

Please help me. Without proper intervention, I am afraid I will commit suicide very soon.
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Avatar universal
Hi. Depression is a very hard thing to cope with, and almost impossible without professional help. Talk to your doctor about your feelings and make an appointment with a psychologist as soon as possible. They will talk with you to help you figure out why you are feeling this way and how to cope with it. You don't necessarily HAVE to take medication, although it can actually be very helpful. And a psychiatrist will help you find what medicine is right for you and does not cause side effects. It may take some time, but it is worth it. There is more to life than depression. Best of luck to you and stay strong.
Helpful - 0
1781249 tn?1356460602
Hmm-mm... ME too!!!
First: Sorry for my bad English.

2nd:
2 years past, I'm exactly like you! I'm very lonely, I cant go outside of home, I just in internet & social network. ran away from my friend, very angry & destroyed  all relationships....
I was hospitalized & left university.
Fortunately I did not commit suicide (because of Religious beliefs.)

-----
So I go to Psychiatrist.
go outside of home (Very hardly, with The embarrassment and discomfort, Even Nausea)
I married & make relationship (with risk)
I tried to Control my Emotions & smirk & grin Instead of angry.
oh! & you can hope in God.
In future, When pass this crisis, feel free, pride & YOU answer other people question.

(don't listen sad musics)
(don't worry about mediation. side effect better than suicide!!!!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Seek the help of a medical professional immediately.  
Helpful - 0
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