Wow, I know this feeling very well. But suicide is never the answer and it may put you in an even worse place...your life is always worth fighting for. You need to get a game plan together. You need to let your doctor know that your medications aren't working. Most often our bodies build up a tolerance for medications and they no longer work for us so we need to be switched to another one, or you may not be on the right medication as it is often trial and error as to which one will work best for us. Doing this will get you in a better place emotionally and then you can move on to the next step in your plan. Take it one day at a time or you will become overwhelmed by it all. I'm sorry to hear about your loss of a baby, I lost a son, I understand your pain. But you have to keep going, see if you can get into one-on-one therapy instead of group therapy as this is not helping you. See if there are any jobs available close to where you live so you can walk to work and then work on getting your license and a car. If you go to your church, or any local one you can find help there in many ways. Journal your feeling, I promise this will help, it is a form of release for us and especially write about your little baby...let you emotions flow as I feel you are dealing with an awful lot that you need to write about. Don't give up on life and never give up on YOU! One day at a time, take back your life and power. I know it's difficult, but not as difficult as where you are. One day at a time and please start with your medications and go from there. You can do this.....
I hope you tell a Doctor or Crisis Counselor what you are feeling.
I know about Suicide - And Pain - And Depression - And Feeling
Overwhelmed - And Hopeless - And Sad - And I also Know About Death....And I know you have a purpose here on Earth, your only job
is finding out what that purpose is.
Lithuim is great to stablize racing thoughts and out of control moods and spending, serquoil, is great for sleep, I am not sure what med's you are on, but you should ask your Doctor, the Lithuim should be taken at night so you do not sleep all day. Brintey Spears, Patty Duke, and more movie stars and signers are bipolar and they take Lithuim, with that said you need to drink plenty of water Lithium is a salt base drug. and it is very old drug but still one of the best. Ask your Doc. about that.
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