I will "third" the great advice you got above. Your post REALLY describes well what you have going on, the battles in your mind, the inability to feel emotion, etc.
PLEASE seek some professional help. While you may not feel remorse, I'm sure you would NOT prefer to be like this? You will get much more out of life if you learn to FEEL, to have empathy, etc.
You cannot diagnose yourself, hon. While there's obviously some worrisome tendencies going on, you cannot say for sure, what is going on.
Please ask your doc for a referral to a psychiatrist. I think bringing this print out is the best idea, mainly because, with your history of being manipulative, you probably aren't going to be straight forward with the doc. You are being very honest here. Honesty is vital for you to get the care you need.
Please update us when you can, and thanks for sharing such difficult issues, and being honest.
Hey
I just wanted to say I hope you do what "thatquietgirl" suggested for you. Sounds like you have a lot going on inside and really need someone to understand you. I hope that you can do that for yourself. Those voices can make things even more confusing!!
Sounds like there may be some other things going on besides sociopathic tendencies. I would take this, print it out, and go for an appointment in a mental health facility for some therapy. A therapist can help you figure out why you've built this wall between you and people and why you feel the paranoia about someone being outside your window or someone breaking in. A therapist can help you figure out ways to cope. I would note that it may take trying a few different therapists until you find one you click with enough to talk to and really reap the benefits, so don't give up!
Step one has been made. You admitted there is something going on that bothers you and you don't understand.
Step two has been made. You reached out here.
Now, it's time for step three, and that is to go get some help to deal with it. As much as I would love to say someone here could help you, few or none of us are qualified for or trained to help people learn techniques to overcome these sorts of things.