If it was just the holiday blues, then I would just feel sad and lonely, but I feel so much more than that.
I live with depression every single day of my life. I struggle to feel happy.
Lately I have been having the overwhelming thought to hurt myself. I know it is in part due to the holidays. I've lost everything and am living with my girlfriend. I shouldn't be living with her at this early stage in our relationship and it's really screwed things up between us, but she is the only friend I had that I could stay with when I could no longer afford to live on my own without a job. I don't have any other friends or family.
Most days I want to just pack up what little I have here and leave to go live on the streets so that I am not living off of my girlfriend. Not that my plan would be to really live off the streets. I really just want to leave so that I can off myself and I can't do that here in her home.
After the loss of a job, loss of my home, loss of all my possessions to storage, having $0.00 of incoming finances, having a strained relationship with the only person in my life, how do I overcome the overwhelming need to hurt myself? What do I do when I am alone, lonely and wishing for death?
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