I'm 17 High school student.
We'll im going to try to put this into something people can understand What I mean SPOILER (if your not going to read the full story Don't Comment)
We'll for the last 2 freaking year's I haven't been able to find anything that interest me I don't like talking to people and actually rather it be that way because people make me want to hurt them when they talk out of ignorance. I haven't told anyone this but "Below"
I woke about 1 month ago and was getting ready for school while i was waiting for my bus I starting Feeling like I wasn't in reality I started thinking about going in my house and hurting someone in my house with no consequences "i don't usually Feel like that" Reality left me for about an hr.
What do I mean when I say Reality Left Me? We'll it goes something like this when those thoughts hit me I felt really good" i actually could laugh and smile. Felt like I had no control for what I would Do.
I feel like no one can understand me, I feel lonely I don't talk to anyone in my family haven't for about 4 months, I stay in my room listening to music and suffering this stupid unending feeling I have felt for 2 year's.
IM OVER IT!!!!! im tired of people saying its life or, you need to go to group Counseling. I wan't it to end.
What the hell would this be? that's truly how I feel right now and have for Years.
also if you wonder if I have had suicidal thoughts. The answer is No. had a hell of a past From being abused from my brother choked out, or being yelled at by my dad and him telling me he was going to beat my head in when my mom wasn't around to protect me.
I have moments when I think about all that "make me hate everyone" I don't like DRAMA that's the number one thing that pisses me off.
Please Tell me what you all think. Thank you (had another post on here didn't like results)
Since you said you didn't like the answers on your other post I looked it up and read it. The advice: meds and therapy. You just dismissed both interventions. There is NO magic pill, No magic thing we can tell you. If you want your life to get better first you have to find out what it is - that means seeing a psychiatrist. The end result, if you are found to have mental illness, is meds and therapy. One concern you listed was " addiction aka "thinking I need it". Addiction is not thinking you need it. Maturity and acceptance of having a mental illness is what gets you to take meds and get therapy. Antidepressants, mood stabilizers and antipsychotics are not addictive. Benzos are addictive, pain pills are addictive.
If you come to a website for depression or other mental illness you will get the same advice - meds, therapy, exercise, regular sleep pattern primarily. Sorry you don't like that advice but that's the way it is.
As for what is insanity? (You didn't address this question in your entry, just the title) It is a legal term, not a psychiatric term.
well I'm not going to take anti depressants "buying happiness isn't anything at all" all that I put in this post is the truth. Insanity by my meaning is "self control" What Happened before I wen't to school never happened agian though's thoughts never happened agian. I don't like talking about about my problem's the internet is about as far as I go. Face to Face confrontation I can't put words into meaning. I would waste time :)
We need people as you are part of people. We need people to help us when we are sick, in need of some material thing or just someone to listen to us like you are posting here. If you fell in the water and was drowning you would need a person to save you. Doctors cure your diseases and dentist fix your teeth. Wanting to hurt people for no reason, you mention, is not fare to other human beings. Youve become a judge and jury and we have seen through history what these type of people can do.
As far as some people saying ignorant things and wanting to hurt them, im sure you have said ignorant things and would not want someone to hurt you because of that.
Your very young and still have not found your interests in life, but i could recomment try some writing like poetry or even song lyrics. You sound like a loner and this lone time could bring a big thing to you if you practice your creative side. Many song artist are looking for lyrics and will pay big money for them. (not the music side, just the lyrics). You could also invent a product as the U.S. is a very big consumer market. (Its not that complicated to do this) Just takes a simple idea.
Also you seem to be lacking a spiritual self, Not religion, but a connection to the earth, the sky and all living things. Try sharing your wisdom with people, teach them about the truth, share with them that all living creatures want to live. Brings wisdom to the ignorant, teach empathy to those that dont care.
Your life is a tool put here amongst others to bring enlightenment. You seem very perceptive. Use your perceptions as a source of strength that will make your life one worth living and a reflection to advance all those in need.
thanks for posting everyone It's really good to hear people's opinions you Can't buy true happiness. but you can make it! I Don't think anti depressant's is something I would truly need. people who suffer from true depression I feel sorry for.
ill Try to help other's like you all have to me here. :D
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