When everyone is gone

I've been suffering from depression my entire life.  Probably the worst part of the disease is loosing those who are important, family and close friends who can no longer deal with it.  My brother severed ties with me a month ago and I understand, he has fear that he'll have to take care of me.   Another long time friend just doesn't respond to emails any longer.   I don't blame him at all ... he wants happiness, not to be brought down by a miserable human being.  

I've been on Effexor and Wellbutrin for several years, I have an incredibly caring psychiarist.   He's the last person left.

I'll be alone Thanksgiving for the first time in my life.  For me it's the most important holiday of the year.   I've unplugged the phone and sit in the dark      At least this way I won't be hurting other people, which is the only thing I can do for those I love.  Everything in my life is the result of all the causes I've made during my life.   It makes perfect sense that my life has led to this.  It's appropriate.  

[MMahon]

Sounds like you are still suffering from some depression. I know how hard it is to be positive when your nervous system is not capable of it.   Don't shut yourself off from the world because some friends and loved ones are too wrapped up in their own lives.  Make your life into something and meet new people who will accept you for who you are, despite some limitations.  People who run from you because of your illness are not worth being around in my book.  Who needs 'friends/family' like that.  Find real friends and build your own family and they'll support you no matter what.  take care!

[j17c27]

The worst thing you can do when you have depression is isolate yourself.  Trust me, I have been depressed a while and have lost all my friends because of it.  It only deepens your depression.  For your own sake, dont shut everyone out.  If people cant accept you for who you are, they are not your friends!