Why do feel lonly and sad and my fears overtake me??

[Love_believe504]

I feel lonely all the time. I feel ugly and not wanting to do anything.
My parents are going threw a divorce and i feel bad seen them suffer In different ways.
Am in love with my husband but I feel reject mostly all the time even if he is paying attention to me sometimes.
What can i do to feel better. I went threw depression a year ago where I lost 40 pounds But never continue a treatment. I don't want feel the same way I did because I started to believe in god more and under no circumstances I want make a sin attempting against my own life. Can someone give me advice to feel better.  

[CRSeaside]

Remember to read inspiring things. Like, you are a child of the universe. You have a right to be here.  Contemplate the moon & the stars.
The sunshine. Be thankful for things in your life you see as positive & good.
You are valuable & beautiful.  It's ok to cry.  Feel better.

[Love_believe504]

Am very sorry for my spelling am like crying right know and barely see what am typing.

[Love_believe504]

Hi,
Thanks for your comment And regarding last year my doctor sent me to talk to a counselor and start a therapy bt i looked threw my option, but everywhere they would tell me my insurance wouldnt cover me, so I gave up. After that my life settled and I controlled more my emotions. I was going threw family problems since I was 13. My parents wanted to divore anf the only one who knew about their intimate problems was me since I was the oldest. They finally decided to stay together because of us my 4 brothers and I. Later on I had problems at work. I decided to quit because things were getting out of control and at the same time i found out my boyfriend of 5 years was cheating on me. And found out things about my parents that killed me inside. And not just that i was always in. An argument with my brothers and they would tell me really bad things. My life was a mess. Well today my dad finally decided to leave my mom and I respect that because his an adult but his hurting my mom and his been very disrespectful with her around my brothers and sister and our whole family, that makes me sad to see her cry, am married but we leave in the same house. I decided to forgive my boyfriend and moved in together his respecting me know but It still hurts what he did sometimes. I don't know why am feeling really ugly even if I put make up on but today i have an appointment with my doctor. Am sorry if I made this long I just feel the need to express myself.

[4Maddie44]

Hello.  Welcome to the depression site.  My advice would be to talk to your doctor first.  I don't think you can cope with the feelings on your own.  I hope the doctor can suggest ways to ease your depression.  

Depression is an illness that can cause people to feel lonely.  It is part of the illness.  We often lack self confidence and do not like ourselves very much.  It is a very complicated illness.  We all have different symptoms, but lack of self confidence is one of them.  You say you did not continue treatment when you had depression last year.  What sort of treatment were you receiving?  Did you feel you did not need professional support any more because you felt better?

Often depression will return.  It has to me many times.

Belief in God is very strong and helpful to anyone in distress, and it will make you stronger mentally, but I am not sure it will help you overcome depression.  

I urge you to find professional help, and not feel so alone in your illness.

Keep us updated, as we all care so much about each other here.  I try to be supportive, but I find I cannot give advice on how to feel better, except for the often said things.  You know, talk to friends and relatives about how you feel.  Get support wherever you can.  Good diet, exercise, etc.  Don't deal with this alone if there are people who can help you through this.  I know depression can be difficult to talk about.