how to survive death of spouse without falling apart

[Needful11]

I need to talk to someone, anyone, I am alone here after my husband died.  His family is out of state and I have no family here, only in PA.  Everyone said we will talk to you, just call us, we are here for you, but then they disappear when I need help.  I can't sleep, eat, and now am sick with stomach ache and diarrhea and don't know where to turn, I feel like an ornament on a tree, just hanging there.

[Bubulous]

Obviously you likely know the stagew of grief.  They don't have a time limit and they often don't follow the same order that is written out but anger is one of them.  When I get overwhelmed it is often not just one emotion.  It is not just anger, or sadness, or loss.  It is likely a combination of multiple emotions.  If you start writing them down it will be easier to catch what thought caused that emotion and so on but it is still a process, there is no easy answer, and I could not possibly understand how you feel right now but I will always try.
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I am sorry for your loss and I been through it before.  It hurts when you have your vitals getting out of hand.  There are definately physical symptoms involved in the grieving proocess.  The mind an the spirit also take a hit pretty hard.

I like to practice a process called flooding many people do it differentely.  I let myself get overwhelmed to the point that I get scared then I pop a rubberband on my wrist.  The pain releases dopamine and often stops my negative thoughts.

Anyway good luck and keep coming back.

Larry

[Anneinside]

In 1992, my husband left me in September and my only child died in a car accident in December. I went from having a family to having no one. I also had no family close by. I went into a deep depression that lasted two years. I went into therapy and then later I started seeing a psychiatrist for medication. I would suggest that you get into counseling and if you are not feeling better after several months then see a psychiatrist for medication. Other than that, I can tell you that it takes time to get over the worst of grief. I still grieve for my child but mostly at her birthday and the anniversary of her death. I feel bad for a couple of weeks before each and then improve after they are over.

[Kelz72312]

first of all im so sorry about your loved one.. i will deff pray for you.. im here for you any time you need to talk just message me please. . or email me im here ***@****... the last part of  your post says you have diarrhea and stomache ache and the not being able to eat or sleep thing is anxiety and depression so you deff might want to seek thearopy help. or specialist to put you on something for anxiety and depression i am so sorry you are going through this im here for you anytie you want to talk..