masturbation

[jtrinka]

hey, im 14 years of age and i need some real help u see i masterbate in fact i just finished and feel awlful right now . ive been masterbating for 3-4 months or so and i want to quit but i dont feel in control of my own body i feel like im weak and awful in the eyes of the lord god. before i masterbate i look at porn for like one minute just to get arroused then u know do it. i do well u know let out the stuff but after this i start to cry and its like the only thing that i cry about ive talked to my mom about it 3 days ago i managed to stop but i did it again 3 minutes ago the longest i went without it is 2 and a half weeks whcih was good but it started again and i feel real low ive even tried things to get my mind off of it such as reading which works real well and other things but it always comes back to bite me im also starting to breath differently which goes away when i dont i think thats because i get so sad i have support from my mom but now im going to start talking to more and more people like u guys online and im going to talk to my mom more and dad and maeby my brothers about this cause im starting to feel really really weak that my mind says no but my body says yes. i had a porn addiction like a big one5 months ago whcih i got caught on looking at so since then i have only looked at it for like 30-45 seaconds just to get aroused and fantazise wwhile i masterbate which i also know is not good but im going to keep trying to quit and hopefully it will get to the point where i say im done or say masterbation is not enough i need sex which im not going to allow my self to get till im married but still i need support please help me.(dont bring up seeing a phsychiatis cause that aint going to happen anytime soon)

[pattifan]

Hi

jtrinka posted this question nearly three years ago.

Hopefully he's a lot more comfortable with his sexuality by now!

Hopefully your post may still be helpful to anyone new who's browsing the site for info though.

Take care

[Honeytree]

Dear jtrinka,  
I hope you've managed to take a little bit of something from everyone's advise here.  You are young and discovering the joy of your body.  Please don't let anyone ever tell you not to.  
Learning to take good care of yourself is imperative and at your age masterbation is part of the process.  Don't be ashamed of an act which is an natural stress relief and which will help you negotiate the rocky road of the reast of your teenage years.  My son is nearly 14 and I hope he is discovering his own body with happiness.  It would just kill me if I thought he was feeling the shame that seems to be overwhelming you. I wouldn't want him to use porn though, not because I'd be angry with him, but because I think porn exploits people not only those who make it but those who read or watch it too.  And, exploitation of people is a far greater crime than touching yourself.
I wish you all the luck in the world jtrinka. x

[MrSatan]

You know i was in your place not too long ago. I hated myself and felt aweful after mastubating. But when i eventually lost my religion, I started to think of masturbation in a different light. Now I feel no, guilt, sadness or anything and I still get to relive my stress through masterbation. Now i do need porn to help me keep me arroused and keep it going longer. I also dispite some websites claims have pretty big long sperm loads, which tend to depend on the length i let the it go on for.  THough I should maybe cut down a little so i get more satifaction from each, but I won't cut stop completly.

But if it's against your religion, then by all means try to not do it. But question why God would give you such feelings and the want to do it, at such a young age, if it is wrong. Plus add to it that you get wet dreams when you horny, which always make me do things out of my control in dreams, why would God give us these if they were wrong? Animals do it all the time, not that I recommend sex, but masturbation is a safe attornative for us humans that want everything in excess and right away.

SEX CAN WAIT MASTURBATE!

[summerlion1123]

There is nothing wrong with masturabtion. It is completely normal and you shouldn't feel bad about yourself for it. The only reason you are obsessing over it is because you feel guilty. Also, your hormones are going crazy because of puberty which will make you think about it a lot, but the obsession comes from your guilt. If you just accept yourself for who you are and be comfortable with your sexuality, then your obsession will probably ease at least a little, though you will think about it a lot still. Just remember to save yourself for the right person, and for marriage if you so choose. But masturbation and some alone time is perfectly normal and healthy.

[soregretfull]

It is normal to explore you own body, to find out your sexuality. If god gave you this tool, to reproduce and pee from,than use it. I don't know any male that hasn't masurbated, if they say they haven't than they are lying.

[mr.lucky66]

Yes it's normal for your age but you might go blind! ha, sorry for being a jerkoff!

[April2]

It may be normal until you are obssessing about it and letting it take over your life. Then it becomes an unhealthy addiction. Also the porn can be an unhealthy addiction.

[justlikeyou]

masturbation is very normal, enjoy it.

[April2]

You're at an age right now where you are going through puberty and your body's going through a lot of changes. It's normal and natural to think about sex. It's good that you want to wait until you marry to have sex. Too many teenagers do it for the wrong reasons (to hold on to a boyfriend/girlfriend, to fit in, to be cool, to feel loved). It's best for you and healthier to wait until you are emotionally and physically ready for that kind of relationship.
It's true that people can get addicted to pornography. I've seen it destroy families and people before. You want to be very careful. These pictures and movies show an unhealthy sexual side where people are using each other just for gratification. They don't give a hoot for their partner. They also never show the terrible things that can happen from having unprotected sex or multiple partners like Aids and std's.
The best thing you can do is get all porn out of your house and don't allow yourself to look at it. Keep busy with healthy things like school, sports, scouts or youth group. Find a healthy outlet for your boredom and pent up feelings. Stay busy. It will pass. The more you stay away from it, the more the pull of it won't be so strong on you. I wish you the best. You sound like a nice, caring kid! Take care & God bless.