need alot of.help

[grew60]

I'm new to this but I have no one to talk to my family my friends no one understands.
I'm 25 years old my life has took a turn in the past few months.
I was with the mother of my son for 5 years my son is 4...she just broke up with me for a few reasons but nothing that couldn't be fix. I feel like nothing matters anymore I just need someone to talk to I can't sleep I can't eat and all I think about it how much better everything would be if I wasn't here anymore if I was just gone. I think about ways about ways to end it but to make sure my family can still say goodbye. To make sure I can have and open casket I love my son and I love my family and x but I just feel like if I was wasn't here everything would be better for everyone involved

[MYoungAtHeart]

I do have to agree with the other poster that your child is the one who will suffer the rest of his life if you end yours.  And there is new studies out that say that if a parent commits suicide, the children also are at risk as they grow up....

Please call a help line and tell them how you feel.  Your little boy needs the best from you, and that is the part that actually had you come here and ask for advice....

I hope we hear from you again soon and that you are actively reaching out for that life line that we all need...

M

[SDB1959]

Dear "grew60""
    You have serious depression. Please call some type of counselor ASAP.

[mammo]

You are hurting right now and it's difficult to think rationally while enduring so much pain.  Suicide is never the answer and where would that leave your little boy...without his daddy!  Who will teach him only the things a father can, do the father and son things which are so important to your son?  It's time to get your ducks in a row and fight for your rights to see your son and do what is best for him. You need to think about your son and your family, which you are very fortunate to have.  Trust me, you will find love again and one day see why this had to happen.  But don't take away the other person who means the world to your son.  We have all had our hearts broken and it's sometimes difficult to move beyond the pain but we must fight everyday to do this.  Fight for your son and fight for YOU!  Don't allow this to strip you of all the good you hold inside,  I promise you will find love and peace with all of this and be happier with time.  Right now there's a little guy who misses his daddy, don't hurt him like you have been hurt.  It's better for him to have two happy homes than one unhappy home.  He deserves to have his father and you owe this to him.  As adults we can reason and make some sense out of this...he can't and will feel he did something wrong if you're not in his life.  In all your pain...your son is the most important thing, and the most wonderful thing in your life.  Let him be the wind beneath your wings to carry you through this rough patch...you'll be glad you did.  My heart goes out to you, but it's now about your little boy and you must not abandon him in any way.  I wish you all the best.