problems

[mandy876]

i not only suffer from severe depression.  effexor works pretty good most days.  i went to my doctor and he ran a bunch of tests.  now i have osteosorosis.  the nurse said my bones are getting brittle.  i  took fossamax but it made my throat swell it was hard to swallow or belch.  and hurt i paced the floor until finally i got sick.  so they put me on nose spray.  i dont know if this is my problem but i have bad stomach cramps.  they really bad.  they are on and off. and i have no appetite.  i only weigh 98 pounds i cant afford to lose any more .  could thisd be causing my problems.

[4Maddie44]

I have received a note from you.  Thank you very much.  Thing is you have blocked receiving messages, so although I have tried to reply to your note, you are not allowing me to do so.  I have asked a moderator to tell you how to unblock notes.  Perhaps you could send me a private message.  Don't block those too!! (just joking)!!!

I know it is difficult to understand computers, but you have now been able to send note, so that is great.

How are you my dear?

[mandy876]

  she has been upset for the last couple of weeks.  i told her we were going to have to slow down on her money spending.  she didnt like that.  i cant afford all the things she needs to live with.  i am not a person that requires much.  im happy with what i have dont need a bunch of expensive things.  i am happy with my little house.  it is paid for and keeps me cool in the summer and warm in the winter.  i love my little home.  she wants fancy things.  not my style.  im going broke if this keeps up.  my husband left me where i would be comfortable.  now i have to worry.  he would be so upset at me.  i got myself in a mess and dont know what to do.  she has not cooked ina month or so.  i eatt tv dinners and sandwiches.  i have lost so much weight.  she doesnt seem to care.  gloria 789

[mandy876]

my niece is bi polar manic depressive.  they have been working on her pills since she was a teen.  everytime they change her meds she gets cross and takes things out on others.  i love her.  her mom told me she didnt want her i culd have her.  its hard to say i love my sis but sometimes i hate her.  does that make any since?

[nursegirl6572]

Gloria, I'm so glad to hear your niece and you are getting along better.  Perhaps your depression is causing you to strike out, even at the ones closest to you?  That happens all the time.  In a way, maybe your niece is feeling a little like we were when you "scolded" us for not replying to your post?  If she is, it could explain if she has been distant lately.  People in those situations just don't know what to do sometimes.  Even though you're feeling lousy, you CAN try to change the way you react to your moods.  It takes time and work, but it can be done.  

I'm just glad to hear things are going a little better for you.  I hope you hear from your other niece soon.  I know being estranged from your family is affecting your terribly.  I can't imagine how awful that would be.  Have you tried to find a therapist yet?  I think it would do you a world of good.

Hang in there!  We're pulling for you!

[mandy876]

i will keep posting here and i want you to be my friend.  that is important.  i was worried about you more than myself.  cant sleep i wrote my niece a note last night.  she is upset at me.  i told her that she did not have to stay with me  she could go to houston and be close to her daughter and son and soon to be another baby.  she informed me she was not leaving me.  she tore the letter up and said lets go get your pills.  i had to go in my pjs and robe.  guess she does love me.  i keep messing up.  i wrote my other niece her sis.  i havnt heard from her yet.  i must have had a wild disorder last night.  dont want any more of those.  love gloria789

[4Maddie44]

Here I am again apologising for the hurt I caused you.  I do care about you, and please let us be friends.

We have apologised if we hurt each other.  I have got over it.  Please say you have too, and will keep posting here.  We will miss you if you go.

We all care about each other so much.  Nursegirl is right, she is the most sensible person here.  

Take care and a big hug.

[nursegirl6572]

Ladies, ladies.  You're both in a bad place place right now, with emotions running high.  Why not just move on.  Gloria said some words that stung, but she has already apologized for that.  Her saying what she did is certainly no reflection on you helping others, maddie.  You are feeling vulnerable, and are overreacting a bit.

Let bygones be bygones...and let's get back to supporting one another.  Nothing good is going to come out of rehashing this over and over.

[mandy876]

  dont let me change anything you do.  you are a great person or i would not have wrote to you.  you are doing a lot of good.  if i messed you up so bad you dont want to help people anymore.  maybe there is something really bad wrong with me.  you do good everyone says good things about you.  never let a stupid person like me change how you feel about helping others.  i think this is what god has planned to help people who cant help themselves.  im sorry im  all upset.  i cant seem to do anything about it.  please dont let me change the good job you are doing here.  please accept my appologize for my stupid remark.  that ruined everyones night.  i am so sorry.  i couldnt live with the fact that you would stop doing all the good you are doing for the people.  they need you.  i need you.  i would not be here is it was not for you.    gloria789

[4Maddie44]

You know I have been feeling bad since you accused me of ignoring you.  Perhaps it is better that I don't try to help others, then nobody will get upset.

I try to help but I hate sarcastic remarks.  I have feelings too and I get hurt easily.  Perhaps you want me to stop trying to help and just putting my foot in it.  I am crying now because I feel very hurt.  I am obviously not helping you and you feel ignored by me, which is not the case.  i have only ever wanted to help.

I thought I was a good person, but I am doubting that now.

[mandy876]

  i want to thank you both.  you have to have a big heart to put up with depressed people whomare scarfed and desparate for answers.  my doc keeps adding problems on to problems.  my body can only take so much.  my main thing is its been nearly a year since i have heard from my sister.  i say i dont care but it hurtsloria789

[nursegirl6572]

Maddie's last post here says it all.  Most people on this forum are hurting, and everyone can help each other.  The key is to pull together, not form negative or hurt feelings because a post went unanswered, or no one replied.  Gloria, you are in a bad place right now, and you overreacted with your post to us saying that we didn't care.  We get it, and you did apologize, which is greatly appreciated.  Just please keep in mind that words can hurt.  Just as you felt hurt when no one replied to this thread, we feel hurt when people accuse us of being uncaring, when we try so hard to help everyone we can.  It's all water under the bridge now...let it go.  From now on, if you post something and aren't seeing a reply, add another post saying "bump".  That will put it back top the top of the page, and makie it more visible.  You could also always send one of us a private message.  NEVER think we're ignoring you.  We're a pretty vocal bunch...we speak our minds and are very honest.  If we felt the need to ignore you for some reason, you would probably have already gotten an earful...lol!

As for your recent problems, I know it's frustrating to suffer with chronic medical conditions.  You always feel you are climbing uphill.  The very best thing you can do, hon, is to continue working with your doctor.  If you aren't happy with the way your doc is handling things, you could always get a second opinion.

Lastly...I want to post a link to one of your other threads, for a few reasons.  For one, to let you see the great replies you got, and how people really DO care, and also, to let you reread some of the suggestions that were made that may help your situation.  If you can manage to lessen your daily stress by improving your situation, you WILL feel a little bit better.  Have you ever tried calling around to any human service organization to ask for some help?  If not, I think you should give it a try.  It may take some work and some calls, but I think you'll be pleasantly surprised at what you find!  Reread the thread....there is some great info and support there.

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Depression/having-a-depression-flare-up/show/1759769#post_8111583

NEVER forget that we DO care, even if it takes us a little longer than normal to answer, or get back to you.  Hang in there, I know you're feeling awful.

[4Maddie44]

Look I am 71 years old, so we should understand each other.  I'm really wanting to help you.  Don't stop posting.  I don't like rejection or confrontation  either.  No you are not a "smart mouth" just unhappy.  But you can hurt others too, like I obviously hurt you.  

We are here to help each other.  Let us do that please.  

[mandy876]

  guess if i am not being nice i shouldnt bother anyone.  sit here and dont know what to do.  just worry.  you can read my last post to you.  im not good on communicating with people im very shy.  i dont take rejection very good im 72 should be used to it by now.  im sorry for being a smart mouth.  i dont know what to do now.  have a good life  gloria789

[4Maddie44]

Is this the post you say nobody responded to in your most recent question?

I think it is because people did not know how to respond, that is all.  You were not being ignored as you think.

It is possible people did not kn ow nhow to reply to your question because they did not know the answer.  Please don't think you are being ignored.  People on this site are to loving to ignore the pain of others.

That was rather a sarcastic remark in your last post "thanks very much." wasn't it?  We do try to help.  You were not saying thank you, you were saying the opposite.  That hurts people like me who try so hard to read what others are going through, and respond in my own way.  Say thank you for the help and support you have received here.