remeron vs effexor

Just want some reassurance that my decision making is sound. My medical doctor recently put me on remeron (Sol tab, not generic) for depression ( A psychiatrist put me on it in 2002 after a bad reaction to Zoloft, and stated that I would probable also have problems with other drugs in this class, such as prozac or paxil. It worked fine. We discontinued it only after my blood count was getting lower). In 2005 lost close friend, close relative, and became a single parent (wife abandoned family). Tried generic remeron and discontinued after 5 days due to side effects (disoriented, weakness). New Phychiatrist wants me to discontinue remeron and go to effexor, with trazodone for anxiety which may come due to remeron withdrawal. My objections to this are the withdrawal effects that i have read concerning effexor, plus the sexual side effects, as well as an additional med for anxiety. So far (day 6 of remeron) all days have been good except one (and that period was only for about 3 hours). I have the normal somnolence with this med, but everything else appears to be alright. I have carefully weighed the risk benefit of this decision. I am also in counseling and am dealing with my issues of loss, low self esteem, and perfectionism.