what works

[vvs_nails]

i hate my life having got a colostomy in aug and suppose to maybe do a reversal Jan, I am just so depressed i hate life. and what kind of pills would or should i get. i've tryed different kinds and nothing is working.

[Kobuk]

Hi, I'm going to get a colonoscopy on the the 30th, good thing they put you out.  My dad had colon cancer, so guess they check on us "kids".  You need to see a pdoc to see what kind of treatment you need, usually some pills work, sometimes they don't depends on your system.  I have tried zolof, celexa, welbutrin.  I'm now on celexa, welbutrin and trazadone for sleep.  I still sometimes feel depressed!  I go to a therapist too.  Hope this helps.

[mammo]

I have 2 sons who had total colectomies at 12 and 16, and a grandson at 10.  We lost our son due to complications due to FAP at 31, and his son the same at 18.  They NEVER hated their lives, and rarely complained.  Fought every day to stay in this world, only to lose.  I wish you could appreciate all the good in your life as they did.  Maybe once you are facing your own mortality, you will have a change of heart.

[vvs_nails]

believe me i know its so wrong and yes i know lots of people would be just happy to be alive and if u knew what a postive person i am, to see me here, i am just in shock myself. hoping to get better

[mammo]

I know what you're going through is tough, and messing with your mind.  You may need to take something to help you get thru this difficult time.  Keep going back to your doctor until they find something that works.  Hang in there, it will get better for you after the next surgery is done.  I am curious as to why the docs are waiting so long to reconnect you?  It's usually only 3 months.

[vvs_nails]

yes i am wondering why he is taking so long also? this ruptured with infection from diverticulitis and he took a foot out that was in aug 11 2009 , he says this is how long it takes for the inflammation to go down, he is a gerneral surgeran, so i am thinking maybe i need to find a real specalist for this, i;ll do the colon test dec 4th to see if i have cancer and after that i will start looking for a specialist, i thnk.
and all the pills they give me, just makes me sleep, so i don't take a pill until maybe when i go to bed, i;m not even sleeping until like 5am and then up by 12- or 1. oh well time is coming. i just read the reversal storys and so meny things can go wrong. i;m afraid

[mammo]

No, don't worry, this is a very common surgery.  Nothing really goes wrong, you just have to make a few concessions and it's not a big deal.  I'm sure your read where I posted about my 2 sons and grandson who had their colons removed at 10, 12, and 16.  I lost my son and grandson, but it had nothing to do with the surgery, or being without a colon, it was due to a complication of their disease FAP, and it was years afterwards.  It sounds like your doctor is being very cautious, and this is great!  You need to make sure everything is healed inside before proceeding to the next step.  What happened to you was very serious, and you're very lucky!  I can see why they are giving you more time. Do they think you have cancer, and what test are they doing?

[vvs_nails]

i am sure hoping i don't have cancer. my grandmas brother died before 40 with colon cancer so i am worried but i had testing done like 7 years ago and i had no cancer so i am hoping its just this div stuff.
the test he is doing is I GUESS, putting a tub in the stoma to check the inside of the colon for cancer or any other bad bowel. i was sure happy to read that the reversal should go good, because everything i am reading is saying so meny things go wrong, i read alot of stuff on you tub and see the sergerys and its just got me scared to dead. i know different things can go wrong, so i shouldn't even being reading but i like to know alittle before going forward. like i didn't or don't really know if having a gerneral surgan is the right kind to have, so when he is doing the test dec, i am going to have to ask him how meny of these reversals has he done. because the stiches down my belly is hurting all the time, same with the hernia, i can hardly push myself to get up. now that i am waring a belt, its getting much better, but why didn't he have me in one from the start?
i am so sorry to read about your son and grandson, boy i just can't evn amagine, just thinking of it makes me cry and want to just stop breathing. my daughter lost her boy friend age 17 he was my daughter is still hurting from him dieing. it was a car accident. and i just got my first grandson, and he has brought much smiles to my face, but with this stoma deal, i can only have him once a week because my hernia hurts so bad from lifting him. i know the pain i went through and with having to do it all over again, i just can't stop thinking about it, andits driving me crazy. i don't even want to eat so my bag won't get **** in. i hate this. and if i knew forsure i wasn't going to have to live with it, i might not be so afraid.
anyways thank u so much for caring, i know my family is sick of hearing about it from me, my husband is so good to me, i would have never thought he would be this nice to me. have a good day and thanks agin. how long ago was it u lost your son and grandson?

[vvs_nails]

sorry but what is fap. sorry new to all this.

[mammo]

Hi, be very careful about what you read on blogs and youtube.  Unfortunately only people who have had a bad experience posts on these, so you never hear from the millions of people with good experiences.  FAP is Familial Adenomatous Polyposis.  What happens is thousands of polyps carpet the colon usually by puberty, and will turn cancerous anytime after up to around 38.  We did not know any thing about this, or that it was in the family, until my 38 year old brother-in-law developed colon cancer at 38 and died.  Then my husband was diagnosed at 31, and died at 32.  All 3 of my children started enduring yearly scopes for the polyps.  At one time it was called Gardners Syndrome, and considered an orphan disease, and very little if anything was known about it. Now it is known to be a part of FAP. This was so frustrating for me. My youngest son was diagnosed at 12, had his colon removed, and is a healthy, 38 today.  My oldest son was diagnosed the same year at 16, colon removed, but suffered many problems.  He was in and out of the hospital so much, but then had a couple of healthy years, married and had 2 little boys.  As soon as the youngest was born it was discovered that my son had a Desmoid Tumor, another facet of this disease.  So, my grandchildren knew nothing but a very sick father, hospitals, and saw things no child should have to see.  It's such a long story with my son, horrific suffering, but he fought so hard to have one more day with all he loved and who loved him.  When he was 31, 10 years ago, we lost him.  He left behind a 6 and 9 year old, who just didn't understand.  As I entered the funeral home, my youngest grandson came up to me and said "grandma you have to be quiet, cause my dad's still sleeping."  It was all so heart wrenching, and I'll never recover from losing him.  One year later, with not enough time to come to terms with the loss of their father, my oldest grandson was diagnosed with it at 10, and had his colon removed.  He suffered many, many setbacks.  By the time he was 16, he had 38 surgeries.  Then they discovered he too had developed a Desmoid, just like his dad.  They were able to remove it, but my sweet Jeff was dying.  With only 10 days left to live, a set of 5 organs came for him.  When he heard the news he cried, saying he didn't think they'd come.  Then on the way to the hospital he started crying again, asking his mom if she thought the doctors would get them in him in time?  The transplants were successful, but he died 4 times on the table.  Then he endured Stage II organ rejection, and had to remain in their tiny apartment for an entire year with nothing to eat by mouth for that year.  He was on TPN, where he had to hook up to IV's twice a day for his nourishment, just like he watched his father do for so long.  This time last year he was doing very well.  He only had one surgery left, and this was to remove his colostomy and ileostomy bags.  His doctor wanted to wait until after Thanksgiving to do the surgery, so Jeff could enjoy his dinner since he was not able to eat any the year before.  This would still give him time to heal and graduate with his class in June.  Jeff and I were extremely close, and spent so much time together, having many talks about his dad. Right before Thanksgiving Jeff called me, and he was really down, missing his dad.  He said "grandma I just wish he was here to toss a football with me."  We spoke for about 40 minutes making plans to go Christmas shopping the following week.  As we were about to hang up he said "I love you grandma, and I replied "I love you too sweetie."  Several days later he walked to the corner store for a candy bar, as he's done many times before.  When he got there, he started vomiting blood, and called his mom.  She raced down there and Jeff was standing in the parking lot still vomiting blood, both his bags filled with blood and he passed out.  He was rushed to the hospital where he died on Dec. 1, 2008, he had bled to death.  As I said my final good-bye to him I said "heads up sweetie, your dad just threw the ball.... The doctors didn't know what had happened and an autopsy was performed.  I chose to never hear the results as I want to remember his last words to me, and his sweet smile that lit up a room and my heart.  I prayed to go with him, wishing to live no longer.  For months his younger brother couldn't sleep in the bedroom they shared, and his sobbings at night would wake his mom.  Jeff and my son's ashes sit side by side in their living room.  My other  grandson is being watched with great scrutiny, but knows he could face the same fate.  It's been heart wrenching for all of us.  My daughter is 37, and 5 geneticists and all the doctors feel she didn't inherit the mutation, but she has a 3 year old little boy, and we test him as if she does.  We know we have to be very vigilant with him, and it will be a yearly decision as to how aggressive she needs to be with getting him checked for this.  They say if she reaches 40 with no polyps, she can relax in knowing that neither she nor my grandson has FAP.  She is almost 38 and was just scoped with no polyps.

[mammo]

During all the above, my daughter was living in Missouri, and I got a call one morning that she had been in an accident.  I was told she was okay, but had a broken leg.  Her company sent their plane for me so that I could be quickly at her side, which made me think this was more than a broken leg.  Upon arriving at the hospital she was in surgery for her leg.  The waiting room was packed as I sat there alone.  One by one the doctors came out, but never calling my name.  Finally, I was alone and waiting, and the doctor came out.  My daughter was on her way to work and a 16 year old girl hit her head-on at 85MPH.  The girl was dead at the scene and my daughter trapped in a mangled car.  It took 40 minutes for them to cut her out of the car and then she was flown to the nearest hospital.  She had a concussion, whiplash, broken shoulder, dislocated shoulder, fractured sternum, most of her ribs broken, both arms broken, broken back, right femur sheared in half in two places, shattered knee, 2 plateau tibia fractures, and several broken toes.  I was gone for 5 months to care for her.  She ended up back in the hospital twice, once for a collapsed lung, and then for a blood clot.  It was a small town and everyone was telling her to sue the parents to which she replied "no, I won't do that.  I saw what my mom went thru losing a child, they've lost their daughter and are suffering enough," I was so proud of her.  On the 1 year anniversary of the accident, my daughter sent the girl's parents a card, saying her thoughts were with them, and their daughter.  She received a nice note in return. I come to the blogs to offer support to people, as this is my way of doing something positive, so that my losses are not in vain.  Sorry this is so long.  I'm sure your family is not sick of hearing about what you are enduring, don't feel that way.  You're going thru a lot, and as women we are vain, and having a stoma I'm sure doesn't help with that! But do eat, you need to keep your strength up, and be healthy for your last surgery. Stay positive, you've got that precious grandbaby who needs you.  I'm here anytime to want to vent or just talk.  Hugs......