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As far as the white dots, how big is the wound...it sounds like she has picked the top layers of skin off, to the point that you can see the pores/sweat glands.
I have an issue with picking any zitty thing that I come across on my body...I put it down to OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) However, I have been able to stop myself with will power and training myself to focus on other things...most of the time. I find that I pick at my arms when I am bored, sitting on the toilet, etc...so maybe avoiding her triggers will help.
As far as the white dots, how big is the wound...it sounds like she has picked the top layers of skin off, to the point that you can see the pores/sweat glands.
I hope that helps a little.