Im a married guy in my thirties with no kids yet and a fairly mundane office job where I work a couple of hundred hours a month --- and Im kinda mediocre at disaster preparedness, but I think I have an unhealthy facination with apocalpyse type scenarios...
I lived through Hurricane Katrina via bug out, and through Hurricane Rita via bug in. Ive read SHTF blogs and think many of those guys are silly, but some of them know some useful info. I probably collect too many flashlights and utility/folding knives and multi-tools. I have most of my camping and hunting gear centralized into one backpack and one bag and I have a hunting rifle I might bring with me if I thought it was appropriate. (I never saw alot of use for carrying a rifle around after Katrina or Rita, but I guess I could see how some people might have wanted to carry a handgun, but I didnt do that cause that might get a fella in trouble) I collect MREs from time to time, and Im loathe to throw away canned food or bottled water. I have two medium sized first aid kits, and a few survival type books like "How to Stay Alive in the Woods" etc.
Lately Ive been wondering why it is that I have found myself facinated with the idea of the Apocalypse or the end. I dont just mean like radioactive fall out from accidents or strikes, or even rolling black outs or whatever. I think the zombie preppers are hillarious, but silly. Ive been through my fair share of hurricanes, both riding them out and evacuating before they hit, so Im not a total disaster noob. And although Ive never been through major riots/civil unrest, back in college Ive been through some rowdy protests where police go rough with the crowds back in college. Not sure that any of that ever makes me ready - but what would.
But why do I (or you) have this facination with the apocalypse itself? Im not overly religious, although yes I have been to church every now and then. I dont have any particularly anti-social thoughts. I rather like the white picket-fence Americana lifestyle that I am striving for, so I dont really want that to go away. But I cant help but find myself wanting to read more and more about the end. Why is this? Do I need some type of medical treatment for this?
You do not need any medical treatment. It does not sound to me that you are overly paranoid and obsessed with the end of the world. I think it's a big interest of yours, I'm sure you like the Walking Dead on AMC, good show. Now, since your asking for medical advice, I will explain my theory on what is happening.
You are looking for action, Rob. You have a boring life right now, or atleast it's too boring for your personality. I think you want the end of the world to happen because you want to mean something, you want to make a difference after the apocalypse goes down, and you wouldn't mind surviving on your own. Now, Rob, I've thought about the end of the world too, because of this whole Mayan 2012 ordeal. And, honestly, I wouldn't mind surviving in a post-apocalyptic era, I think it would be awesome. It would teach you to become a real man.
I recommend you travel and explore. Maybe research into the military, if you want to be fighting people with guns.
Rob, you're fascinated with the apocalypse because you believe you would have the intelligence and courage to survive it.
Just remember existential paranoia is when you believe something catastropic may happen and you end up being right. Having in the distant past been associated with the military nuclear arsenal, I can assure you that concern over a nuclear attack is by no means unreasonable. For those who live near Savannah Georgia there is an unexploded hydrogen bomb with capsule in the River that was dumped by a B-47 fifty years ago that has never been found.
The danger from nuclear weapons is very real. I don't keep a geiger counter around for fun.
On the disaster preparedness section I discuss handguns and weapons in general. Get a carry license, training, and preferably one from adjoining states. Many states have reciprocity. There are now numerous seven-shot revolvers available that are perfect for the novice. An experienced shooter in the United States generally prefers a semi-automatic.
As for a rifle there is only one choice. A Springfield M1A (the civilian version of the M-14) with twenty round magazine. Purchase Federal match ammunition (a case) and seal the primers with primer sealant. NEVER oil the cartridges. In a disaster such as Katrina, if you have a handgun and will be passing through vehicle checkpoints place it in the air-cleaner above the engine.
Contrary to popular belief having a handgun does not mean you will be hurting anyone. Often the mere presentation of the weapon will prevent criminal action.
Obtain a diesel back-up generator. Again, see the "disaster preparedness" section for my recommendations.
You are not guilty of mental illness for considering worst possible cases. The veneer of civilization is quite thin. Thinner than one might think.
It's a scary world. With the advent of the internet and the availability of cheap cameras which document the worst part of humanity, of course it's easy to think about end times. Sure you could by the generator or lose sleep about a lost a-bomb or go get particular gun. Sure you could hope for the end to "become a real man" but all of that seems like a lot of energy spent on something that may or may not come.
When I feel this way, I've come to realize it's because I fear losing the things I value most--my partner, my friends, my family, my cat--and I cherish them.
Maybe try writing about it and see what themes come out. You might be surprised. You might also come out with a pretty good story.
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