My mom and dad up when I was five. They both remarried when I was eight, I'm 13 now and my mom and step dad are splitting too! I'm so angry and upset. I have panic attacks sometimes and cry and freak out for no reason. People think I'm crazy. No one understands. The divorces are REALLY hard for me to cope with!
Oh, I'm very very sorry to hear this. I know it is really hard. My parents divorced when I was older, in college. It was hard for ME and I wasn't living at home anymore. Kids are often the victims of substantial change in their life caused by divorce. My hope would be that the aftermath will be a more peaceful place for you to live. If your mom and step dad fought a good deal, it will be nice to not live with that tension. Perhaps this tension became so normal for you that you weren't even aware of it but it is almost always present when a couple is fighting and heading to divorce.
So, that is on the positive side of things regarding their divorcing.
Remember, your own life when an adult doesn't have to include divorce. I didn't want my too so I was very slow to pick out a life partner and VERY careful. I've now been married almost 13 years and together 16 with no divorce on the horizen. i married someone that also believes that marriage is a life time commitment and was very very thoughtful about the decision as to who to marry.
As far as the anxiety, reach out to your school counselor. Often schools have resources and peer groups for kids whose parents are divorcing. If you are having severe anxiety and panic attacks, please ask your mom to take you to a doctor to get some help. Talk therapy can be wonderful to help sort out emotions. Please ask to go. good luck dear
Hi....I'm so sorry that you are going through this. I know at your age you feel like adults are perfect and don't make mistakes...but we do. Like you, we're still learning. It's sad that you have had to endure two divorces and it's imperative that you speak to your mom about this so she can get you some help in coping with all of this. It's okay to cry, you're hurting and the crying is good for you. Also, journal everything you are feeling and thinking about this...it's very therapeutic as it serves as a form of release for us. I hope you know that you are innocent in all of this and please don't let it make you bitter towards marriage one day. There are no guarantees in life, things happen and how we deal with it is what is important. I'm sure when your parents married each other they never dreamed they'd ever divorce but they did and you were caught in the middle. Now you're going through it a second time, I know it's painful but your life will go on. I'm sure your mom is hurting as well so it would be good for the two of you to talk. You still have two parents who love you dearly and that will never change! Please talk to your mom, she loves you and wants to know if you are hurting. Big hugs...
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