Its been 5 months i have been seperated from my husband and we are now in the process of Divorce. This all happened due to his obsessive family and they have brainwashed him to believe me and my family are bad. I loved him sooooo much and we were best friends for 12 years, we only hung out together so our social life with friends was fairly minimum. Issues arose after marriage - living with his family. They didnt warm to me and as with any new environment it takes time to adjust... when his siblings were wrong no one stood up for me not even my husband. It got to the point his mother told me to go back to my mum's. I refused.. Incidents were created petty things and i was then dropped to my parents home twice. 2nd time round, which is the most recent i decided that enough was enough and they couldnt keep dropping me. Over the last 4 mths he has insulted me and my family to no end and refused to meet me only if i apologised on something his family had fabricated and plotted. I refused to say sorry and base my marriage on a lie. He was the most charming and caring guy behind closed doors, but in front of his family he was in full support of them and would put me down and he said he was wtaching me and testing me how i would be around his family. I still love him.. my mind says he is no good but my heart is missing him. He wont respond to any emails or messages and is making our friends cut off from me. Do you think i am doing the right thing, or should i just go back?
This is not good "Best Friend" behavior
This is not good Spouse behavior
A good "Best Friend" AND a good Husband would "have Your back"
So Yes, I think You are doing the Right Thing.
I'm sorry for Your pain but You do deserve to Feel Good and Be Happy. Don't listen to Your Heart - Listen to Your mind (Your mind is Thinking, Your Heart is Feeling) Love is a CHOICE. You CHOOSE (with Your mind) who to love for the "right" reasons and the Heart will be taken care of.
It frankly doesn't sound like you can "just go back" even if you wanted to. And I don't know why you would want to go in for more pain and abuse on purpose. His family sounds pretty crazy. If you are buying into the craziness, see a counselor. Good luck.
Thanks for your comments.. i know he will regret this one day.. he is just completely influenced by his parents and siblings. What they say is his happiness. I just wanted even for closure sake for us to meet and talk 1-2-1 but he refuses and says i have lost any right to even meeting him now. How can i convince him i am telling the truth over what his family are saying to him?
Sorry to hear what your are gowing through.Most of us are in the same boat.
I suggest you do not do any begging.You are supposed to be his family like his parents and siblings are;You are not a doormat;
if he cannot respect you,you are better off without him;
Please have faith in you,look out for a job and start a cherishing life;I am sure with positive thoughts things will turn for good in your life;
You gave him a chance,he refuses to talk,now it is his abd luck(refusing someone who cared for him);I am sure you will fin someone in life who will have respect and love for you ;
And better not to be with a baby boy who gets influenced by everybody else and did not ahve faith on you.I know what it feels like when things are like this.I have ome a long away from all this drama now; and started a healthy and refreshing life.
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