My ex left me with a lot of debt, credit cards I did not even know about that sort of thing ... just tonight my own grandmother told me that while we were married, she loaned my ex a couple thousand dollars and said that my ex said not to tell me ... but its been several years and she would like something back ... so I am on the hook now for that money in addition to other money ... over 20 grand now ... all money I have no idea about to begin with.
She on the other hand, has great credit and no one is coming after her and all she has to say is "its all in the past, just forget it" and cant seem to understand that its not in the past, I am still being pressed every day for this money that she spent and failed to tell me about ...
Hi there. Can you get a lawyer? How is your name on the credit cards and not hers?? And I would tell your aunt---- in all seriousness that she needs to contact your ex. that you love her (your aunt) but if it was a loan to your ex and you never knew anything about it---- then the ex needs to be in charge of paying it back. I know that is awkward but really---- how or why should you be responsible for that? Other than it being your aunt?
I'd really investigate how you can get out of her debt via legal means.
ugh. that is a rough one. That would be such an insult upon injury!! I feel for you!
I couldn't agree more with specialmom. You need to find out what your options are and not get roped into paying for your ex's debts. Your grandmother loaned the money to your ex...not you, it's up to your ex to pay her back, not you.
She took it out while we where married ... I did not learn about for years ... and likewise she borrowed that money from my gma with out telling me ... I tried that lawyer thing, but it just cost so much in money and time ... I love my gma and she is on a fixed income, so I feel a burden to pay her back ... *****, that my ex did this ... and this is one of the nicer things that she did
I just learned that she was also running around bars and sleeping with several different men .... its amazing to me that I spent so much of my life with a woman only to learn that I had no idea who she really was ...
My ex husband left me 1 year and half ago and he took 200 000 out of our bank, transfer all the debt on to my cards and his kids and I had nothing, I got myself a good lawyer, it has been a long haul. However I sat back and made up a budget and stuck to it, I have 2 years to being debt free and I have just bought a small house. So hang in there, but it is important to see a lawyer and if you can not afford one then ring a free legal advice and see what your next step is. You will make it thought this and be even better off...good luck always here if you want to talk.
Well I am glad you are things are getting better, you sound like a really good man. You know good things will come to good people. She will be alone forever where people like you and me with a big heart will always find someone to laugh with, to love with and most of to tell secrets to. Keep on remembering your life can be a good and happy one. Always here to talk if you need it. Linda
My ex did the same to me...he had a gambling problem, and was a cheater.
All the bills were under my name...phone, cell phones, credit cards, power, gas,...the list goes on. He had no credit when we got married...so everything was under my name.
In the end, he kicked me out. I got the bills...he got the house. I couldn't afford a lawyer and the " freebie lawyer " did nothing for me. I signed the house over to him in her office...she was in the next room...she did nothing to help me. I was sick...I was on lots of medication...I was NOT in my right mind when any of those papers were signed...and on top of that I was depressed...and had been dependent on him for 16 years. He had made all the decisions. I was also still hoping to get him back. I was still in love with him.
In the end, I got the bills to pay off, I got the van, and he gave me $10k.
That's it. That's all.
I struggled for a year before that money came in. Sleeping on people's couches...searching for work...not getting hired because of my age, size, being a woman, etc.
The money came in after a years wait...a very long wait.
I took the money and started a business.I had no choice...no one was hiring. Paid $5000 for the business license, and lawyer fees. Bought some tools with the rest...and two month's rent.
Now I own a fairly successful business. I'm not rich, but the company has been in business for over 8 years...which means that I'm over the 7 year hump...so chance of failure now is slim.
I got the better of him in the end!
Now he wants me back...or at least my body. lol!
And he's getting nothing. EVER!
I hope you end up doing the same thing to your ex! Show her that your life is better without her!
You WILL make it! You will be debt free! It may take time...like it took me...but you will be!
Actually I'm not quite debt free...still owe on three credit cards...but they ARE going down.
If I, being a very weak, timid, and tired old woman can do this...you can too.
Good luck, and chin up. Don't let her win!
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