Divorce & Breakups Community
I lost myself....
About This Community:

This patient support community is for discussions relating to divorce, breakups, anger, child custody, child support, conflict resolution, co-parenting, dating, depression, friends and family, legal, pets, property issues, remarriage, spousal support, and visitation.

Font Size:
A
A
A
Background:
Blank
Blank
Blank
Blank Blank

I lost myself....

I was with the man i loved and saw a future with for 4 years and we had good a horrible times and i was young so it failed. I dont want him back, but i do want to be happy again and feel that comfort. Then, I went a little nuts and dated some scum and had traumatic things happen along with a blessing a baby. Anytime I get near a guy I get a horrible sense of anxiety and want to become a recluse. Whats going on i dont feel like my outgoing bubbly self???? i take prozac and i still cant deal with men. Theres a guy i like but i cant get over this....
4 Comments Post a Comment
Blank
1268057_tn?1399131913
Well, how long ago did you break up with the guy you were with for 4 years?

Have you tried seeking therapy for this?
Blank
Avatar_f_tn
Therapy isnt in my budget. Almost three years...
Blank
973741_tn?1342346373
Hi, listen.  You sound like you may have some anxiety----  but also that it just isn't time for you to be dating.  I would not worry about trying to be with a man right now.  You've got your baby to care for (who may be a toddler now) and can focus on your own life without trying to find a partner at this time.

Maybe your budget will improve down the road and you will be able to seek some counseling.  Something to look at is why you made the choices you did in the past that ended badly/ had trauma associated with them.  You do not want to repeat patterns----  so perhaps being anxious about repeating them again would make sense??

I am not sure if you are just saying that being around A man makes you have anxiety which is different.  By the way, you could possibly be treated for anxiety by your primary care physician.  This isn't ideal but the medical aspect to anxiety can be helped with medication----  full therapy along with medication is the best approach to fully treating anxiety.  But if you can't do the counseling part for now, being medically treated for anxiety is better than nothing if you suffer clinical anxiety.  good luck
Blank
1268057_tn?1399131913
Ideally, you need therapy ALONG with taking Prozac.  You should definitely get this sorted before attempting to date anyone.  At this time you are not in any position to be dating.  You need to take care of yourself first and figure out why you are having all this "anxiety" related to men and why you don't feel like your "bubbly" self among other things.  It is obvious something went terrible awry with this last relationship you were in AND/OR you were this way perhaps before the relationship and the relationship intensified the issue or issues.

Three years is a long time to be feeling like this.  Perhaps there is an organization or a therapist that you could see for free or low cost in your area.

Perhaps the Prozac isn't effective for you and you can always talk to your prescribing physician about that.  

Ideally........therapy + medication=more effective.

Agree with Specialmom too.
Blank
Post a Comment
To
Blank
Weight Tracker
Weight Tracker
Start Tracking Now
Divorce & Breakups Community Resources
RSS Expert Activity
233488_tn?1310696703
Blank
New Cannabis Article from NORTH Mag...
Jul 20 by John C Hagan III, MD, FACS, FAAOBlank
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
3 Reasons Why You are Still Binge E...
Jul 14 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
Emotional Eating: What Your Closet ...
Jul 09 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank
Top Relationships Answerers
973741_tn?1342346373
Blank
specialmom
Avatar_f_tn
Blank
TTinKKerBBell
CA
1268057_tn?1399131913
Blank
Londres70
France