My boyfriend is Bipolar and its tearing our gay relationship
Im gay and my boyfriend is bisexual. He prefers having a gay relationship. However, he is diagnosed Bipolar. As a little boy he lived in several foster care homes as his mother abandoned him at 7 yrs. old. We met through the internet while he was in jail and wrote more than a hundred letters to each other. I live in Texas and he lives in Kentucky. After he was paroled we visited each other several times for a few days and seemed to hit it off.
He said he loved me and I felt the same way. He has no problem with fidelity. However, he recently moved in (about three weeks ago) with me in Texas and it has been a rollercoaster of a ride. I do everything to please and help him and love him. Its difficult for him to display emotion and says its due to walls he built to protect himself. He became friends with my neighbors in my apartment complex and now likes to spend 10 to 12 hours with them playing video games and running errands with them saying he needs friends. He spends few hours with me and he continues to say he loves me. We are intimate and have no problems in that area. Although he is not addicted to drugs there has been a few times he drank and gets verbally abusive and has anger issues. He says he moved 2000 miles from his hometown to be with me to prove his love for me. I am a 54 yr. old gay man and he is 36 yrs. old. he keeps saying that it does not matter to him. As he had a relationship with a 53 yr. old man when he was 18 yrs. old. He is not taking his Seroquel on a regular basis. I don't think this is working out even though I really do love him. Can anyone shed some light to help me out on my situation?
I don't know about "gay" Relationships but I DO know about Relationships and to say One (anyone - gay, straight, whatever) is "bi-sexual" strikes me as promiscuous. My personal opinion is One (anyone) should choose male OR female and stick with it, not bounce back and forth. To me, that would be an issue I would NOT consider in a Relationship.
I don't know about bi-polar either, but I DO know about Relationships and this one sounds one-sided. You are the "giver" and He is the "taker". In MANY relationships One Partner Loves more than the Other. The One who "cares the least" is the One who has the power/control. I also know Love is a choice. You can CHOOSE to love SomeOne who is more compatable to You, Your Wants, Hopes, Desires, Character, Standards, Values, etc., etc.
There is an age difference here, BUT He is not a boy - a 36 Year Old Man is close to middle age HimSelf. It seems extremely immature for a 36 Year Old Person to play video games 10 to 12 hours a day!!
I think He has an alcohol "issue" if when He drinks He becomes angry and verbally abusive. This is not "normal" behavior. Remember, alcohol IS a drug and IS addictive.
and - why was He in jail?
He seems like a poor "choice" to me and I'm certain You could "choose" a better Relationship than this.
Hi and sorry your going through this. If you are giving him money and he is not working and supporting himself, he is using you for sure. Do your neighbors use drugs as is a little suspious that he is running errants for them. What is an errant anyway?
You made a bad choice, it happens. This guy is using you and the fact that he moved so far to have someone support him means nothing as far as I'm concerned. Let his "friends" support him...you deserve better than this. I also think he's immature and has a lot of other issues which are compounded by him not taking his medication. This is not a good situation in any way for you, get out of it and get on with your life. You're not a priority with him, find someone who truly cares about you and wants to spend their time with you. This guy is along for the ride and no more. I wish you all the very best!
Yesshhhh I had a brother in law who was bipolar and did not take his treatment seriously, he was a night mare ... often getting violent. And one time I had to call the police because he was about to hit his sister in the face and then tried to choke me ...
Personally, I would be very careful of anyone with that problem who does not take his or her treatment seriously
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