What is the deal these days ? I don't know but when I stood in front of an ordain man of the cloth that meant something to me . We took vows in front of god to god to forever be faithful and loving in sickness an in health good times an bad times till death do we part. ANd I stand by those vows but I'm not so sure my wife is or will? That up to her I guess. Todays world is just so messed up have we lost the concept of true love an faithfullness is marriage just a piece of paper nowdays ? When u got married in days of old U were married and that's all there was to it . If u weren't in it for the long haul why would u do it. It just makes thing worse especialy when you start adding kids cuz really there the one that r going to pay the price. Yet its a catch 22 if she wouldn't Have married me I wouldn't have two great kids but now its got down hill and there going to pay . So I can say I wish she wouldn't have married me. But then I wouldn't have them . Sorry for rambling just looking for anyones input on commitment please and how they feel about it this whole world can't be that messed up I hope?
Be strong brother, this has happened to me twice before and i have actually said all the you wrote. But you know what, its the best thing that has happened to you as these things happen for a reason. You have experience now and will meet the truly right person soon. If she thinks this other ex is a big deal, then good for him and he can have her. You should not feel hurt or sad but get mad as she is messed up not you.
And your right in that you have the kids. She did make a vow to God and now changed her mind. Payback is a beach. Keep posting
There ARE many Who feel the way You do about Marriage and the Vows and Promises. Sadly, there are many who do not. It all comes down to Integrity, Morals, Standards, Character - some have it, some don't.
We need to Marry more "carefully" than We often do.
Many times (probably, most times) clues and red flags are there, but we are so caught up in the excitement of "love" that we don't "want" to see the negatives. If You look back, think back, You may see things in "hindsight" that You simply didn't want to acknowledge at the time.
That being said, I am sympathetic to Your pain, as in, I've shared the same pain. I too, Married a Man who's commitment wasn't as important to Him as it was to me. We had 3 Children who were also hurt. So, I understand, truely I do.
Just to put a different twist to this. I went on a 40 day trek to Nepal and at 18,000 feet i visit a very holy place called Muktanath. I went to a spot and saw the fire and water mixing coming out of a rock and also went under the 107 fountains. It is said that those that see the fire and water and go under the 107 fountains receive the Gift of Muktanah which is highly sort after.
When i got back home i found a picture of a guy in my bed in my bathrobe smiling.
I moved out and went to a holy man and ask what the hell was the gift! He said the gift was her leaving as my life and soul were in danger and it could have been spiritual damnation as well.
Looking back, it was the best thing that ever happened as was following her lifes values and desires.
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