sperated for 3 months

I am currently 21 weeks! This past summer me and my husband seperated for 3 months. We had divorce papers ready to be filed... I thought my marriage was over! During the three months I had a fling with someone that I knew would never amount to anything. Come to find out I am carrying his baby... Me and my husband r back together. Things have been extremely difficult emotionally because my husband brings it up constantly. I feel horrible about the whole situation but  I never want to regret this precious baby that's growing inside of me and that's what I'm afraid of! I don't know what to say to my husband or feel anymore... I have just been down right depressed.

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how should i be feeling

1 Member voted

[specialmom]

Hi,  I'm not voting in your poll as my brain is a little fried today and I'm not sure I understand it.  

but, I will write to you regarding your situation.  Ugh.  I'm happy for you that you got back together with your husband.  And while the 'fling' hurts him, it wasn't like you flat out cheated (although, until we ARE divorce we really are still married).  It may make him question you in terms of running directly into another man's arms for comfort.  This might even be something for you to explore with a therapist to understand how the fling happened yourself.

This is not about beating up on you but helping you with some self relflection to learn from life (as we all should do).

Now, does your husband know that you are pregnant with this fling's child and not his?  If he says he is accepting of this, go with it.  Be happy for the baby to enter your life and that this child will allow your husband to be a father (fatherhood is not just giving sperm, right?).  I'd suggest you maybe do some couple's therapy just to get on solid ground with one another before the baby arrives.  Reassure your husband that you are thrilled to still be with him.  

If he doesn't know the baby isn't his (and are you sure it isn't?)---  ugh.  You probably would have a hard time hiding that for eternity. You would really have to tell him in my opinion.

And if you are depressed, talk to your doctor.  You may not be able to take medication while pregnant but there are other things you can do.  talk therapy as already mentioned but some nutrition and exercise things can also help.  

I do wish you luck and peace