My baby boy "Boris" passed away this Christmas Eve...1 day after his test results came back positive for kidney failure. He was an 11 1/2 year old minpin. He was the best...we spent every night I was at home cuddled up together. I'm torn up inside and I hardly know what to do...the holidays will be grey from now on. I hate that I put him in the emergency vet clinic to try to help him instead of spending his last night with him. He passed on before I could get to him. I'm mad about that the most...I wonder if he thought I deserted him.
Hey guys... I don't know if anyone will read this but I would like to introduce myself... My name amid mike and I am 15... And I'm going through everything myself. My dog bandit, an Australian shepherd, a blue Merle... He is going through total renal failure as a result of pancreatitis. I am using someone's advice about tums... I hope it helps. Bandit is only 7 years old. It's very hard for me right now as I raised him. When my father left, bandit was my moms shoulder to cry on. When my grandmother was on her death bed, bandit was there too. Bandit has helped in nursing homes to cheer up elderly folk. I don't know what to do anymore. I cool meals for him, I feed him from hand, I pet him, and me and my mom give him an IV. I think my point here is that you never get to see it from a kid's standpoint. Bandit is my puppy and I know he is going to die... His phosphorous is starting to cause rain damage... And I already know what I want to say to him. They say in Mongolia when dogs die, their bodies are reincarnated into a human to enjoy life and grow with all of his past memories and dogness left behind... But his soul remains dog and is released into a field where they may run and play and never hunger, thirst, or tire. I want bandit to be happy and I know it is the right decision. If anyone else is at my place and time right now, I urge you to spend as much time with your dog as possible before- you know... It happens. I am sad to say, Bandit will not be seeing another Christmas morning. He will not tear open his stocking full of treats and play with our other dog, rusty. He will go peacefully though... And I embrace that. And to help your heart... Give the dog your blessing. Give them your blessing.
i just wanted to say that while i went through this with my best friend rizzla june- oct 2010, this forum helped me a lot!! i just came accross the link again in my email account and wanted to say thank you to everyone...
Oh Karla, thank you so much for your message. I cried buckets when I read it, but in a nice way. You are so right, waking up was horrible, remembering and then preparing to go outside the bedroom to a house without BB in it. And today, everything is a first, all the usual routines with her being part of them. It is absolutely heart wrenching. And today I should at least hoover the living room, which hasn't been touched for over a week and the rugs are getting ready to crawl out the room of their own accord. But I can't do it today, because it feels like I am removing the last of BB's hairs, I may not do it tomorrow either, though I know these things have to be done sooner or later.
Thank you for being there. And for understanding. Your kind words mean so much. I wish all us doggy lovers could get together and give each other a giant hug at times like these.
Hello Tony.....I thought about you and BB all night and know you hated to see the morning come......I remember the feeling all too well....I'm glad you had the courage to end her suffering, although IMO, it's one of the hardest things you will ever have to do!
I'm also glad she's at peace and how fortunate to have such a faithful companion for 12 years.....My heart goes out to you as you adjust to now a quiet house.....This one is hard! There will be signs of her coming to visit you....You might think you imagine it, but it will be real.....You may not realize it at the time, but will be able to look back and make the connection...Then you will know!
I'm glad you found us so we could offer a little comfort for a few hours.....You sound like a wonderful pet parent & the world needs more like you....
Please know you are in my thoughts & I'm delighted that you intend to hang around here......I wish you peace......Sincerely, Karla
~~~Run Free BB~~~You Were Much Loved~~~One of The Lucky Ones~~~
My beautiful girl passed away at 4.30 this afternoon, in her own bed at home and in my arms. She is no longer in pain. Though I am utterly heartbroken, I am also relieved that she is not suffering any more. I will miss her more than words can describe. Thank you for your support over the last day or so. It has truly meant so much and I intend remaining on the site and the forums to return some of the kindness shown, in BB's honour.
Thanks. I said those very words to my ex-partner, with whome I got BB 12 years ago and who came yesterday to visit specially to say goodbye to her. No matter how much heartache or pain this is causing me, it is inconsequential to the happiness and support she has given me throughout her dreadfully short life. I didn't want yesterday to end, and certainly didn't want today to begin, yet I was up at 5am, unable to settle or sleep very much. I will be back later in the day. Thank you for your support ... and thank you to any doggy owners/carers who read this ... you are so needed in this world.
Dear Tony,
I am so sorry.
You will have the strength to do what she needs you to do when the time is right. You will have to think like a dog. In the moment.
That's the trouble with these angels.....they leave us with broken hearts.
But what they show us while they are with us -that's priceless.
God bless her lovely spirit. If you need any support after she has passed, please do come back. I don't think there's one of us here who wouldn't understand what you are going through.
"It's better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all."
Thanks Karla. I will read it in full, if only to further educate me about what has happened to my wonderful BB and, maybe, prevent it happening to others by spreading the information I have obtained about kidney problems in dogs over the last few days. In truth, I have been grasping at straws, hoping to find something to help her ... but it has gradually become very clear over the last 4 days that my best friend and companion has gone beyond the helping stage. It is heart wrenching. But I do know what has to be done.
Welcome Tony...I'm so sorry that you've found us under these circumstances....My heart goes out to you as you make the unselfish decision for your girl.....
There is another thread here that you may be interested in reading....It's very lengthy though, so you may not be interested......I have bumped it up to the first page so you can find it easier.....It will be titled "4th Stage Renal Failure in my Dog"...You will find that you are not alone on this one & it may help you alittle....
Again, I will be praying for you & hope that those "Happy Times" you speak of, will help heal your heart......Sincerely, Karla
Reading the forum is like reading emotions and experiences of my own situation over the last few days. On Thursday last, our beautiful 12yr old lurcher BB was diagnosed with the late stage of kidney failure, with only about 25% of kidneys functioning. On that day she was generally ok, walked along the beach, ran a little, ate her usual full meal, though she had been a bit off her food over the prior month. Just 4 days later an we are near the end. She has lost an enormous amount of weight, can't stand up without me helping support her and hasn't eaten anything for 2 days now. We've tried cooked chicken, beef, fish and everything that up to last week she used to gulp down quite happily. I would never believe a dog could deteriorate so quickly and by such degrees every day. When we were at the vets on Thursday, he suggested euthanasia, but said we could have a week with her to make this decision. On that day, the decision seemed inappropriate, but today I know that she is starting to suffer and I must prevent that at all costs. Tomorrow, we are having the vet come to our home for the dreaded deed to be done - and I have never cried so much or felt so utterly helpless. BB has been an extraordinary dog, coping with the traumas of seperating from my partner a few years ago, dealing with lots of disruption, moving home, taking in a 2nd (slightly mad) rescue dog and has been my ever faithful companion, friend, soulmate. I love her so much, it is tearing me apart to see how she is today. All I want to do is help her - but there is nothing that I can do, other than end her suffering. All that said, I wouldn't change a thing, this is the cost of the unconditional love I have had from my BB over the last 12 years. Though it is painful now, there have been so many happy times.
I feel your pain... I am in the same situation but actually worse.. I have been devoting my 24/7 for my little terrier who is almost 17! Today she spit out pools of blood and was rushed to the ER, on top of the renal failure, heart murmur, seizures, collapsing trachea and now she has abscessed teeth. I want to fix her teeth, but that is not without risks.. But if I don't.. Her infection of the rotten teeth/abscessed teeth will eventually spread in her bloodstream and not to mention her heart and kidney will be effected as well. She was doing so well until last week, and I am not sure what to do now!
Should I put her under so the vet can fix her teeth? Or should I not do it? And see her suffer either way? On top of it, my dad is also in denial about the whole thing! He would probably hate me forever if my dog die on the surgery table! He thinks that antibiotic will solve the abscessed teeth!! But I know it won't, and soon or later it might claim her life!!!!
I don't know what to do and I feel I am totally lost!
I am writing you to let you know that you are not alone, and I totally understand what you are going through! Because I face the same 24/7.
Please take care of yourself so you have energy to care for your beloved pup! You are his/ her world, and it can only count on you to survive this ordeal.
Please know that people are praying for you and your dog! And you just have to believe one day everything is going to be ok!! Don't give up your faith or your pup!!
Big hug!!
Kc
Thank you for sharing your story. I've just started down this path and the vets seem reluctant to tell me what the end stage of this disease will be. They just tell me there is no cure and the prognsosis is not good. We could go weeks, months, maybe a year before the end. I just want to know what the end will look like so I will know I'm making the right decision rather than robbing my Bear of his life. The stories here let me know I'm not the only one with a broken heart over this sort of news. We're on our second round of fluids. He responded really well to the first round, had a great week, but by the end of the week, he didn't want eat again and his urea breath was back. He's shedding like crazy. But otherwise, he's himself...and that's why I can't get my mind around the fact that he's dying...because he's himself. He still wanted to play with that puppy in the lobby the other morning when we checked in for the second round of fluids! He's dragging me all over the property when I go visit him and walk him. I don't know how I will know. And that's how I found your discussion.
What a lovely memorial for Thor. :-) We all understand how awful the "house of depression" is at times like this, but time really does heal the wounds. For me, I have to keep trying to remember all the good times when awful memories of the end get too intense.
Both Travis and Chica were cremated, and are now in a good place with us in our family room. Travis was the first dog we lost, and our intial intentions were to place his ashes in his favorite spot in our yard. Well, time went by and I just couldn't find the right time to do it. My husband couldn't bear to think about it all. (Why is it that we women have to always be the strong ones and make these kinds of decisions?) After a couple of years, I realized I didn't want to leave him here knowing that we will eventually move. I actually have it in my will that any cremated pet remains shall be placed in the casket with me when I go. Who says I can't take them with me? :-)
Hello, I just thought I would write and let everyone know that my husband and I are starting to get better., As some of you all know, we lost our beloved baby Thor March 29, 2008. Tommorrow will be three weeks, we had him cremated so every day when my husband comes home I light candles for him and tell him "Daddy's home". Everyday Thor and I would wait for Daddy to come home and I made a big deal out of it just to get Thor all excited so lighting the candles for him is just a way for me to have something normal in my life. To this day I still wake up looking for him and sometimes I truly think he is still here right at my feet. I know we did the right thing by him but I miss him terrible. I want to thank all of you for "just being there" especially when we found out he was in kidney failure. I dont think I would be as strong now if it wasn't for you, so again THANKK YOU!!!!
Always grateful, Chrissy1029
Am so sorry i feel your pain, its so hard to belive they are gone. i know its not easy but try and think of nothing but good with your baby, ya was great parents and she was well loved,she had a great life that ya gave her so be proud and remember all the good times. ya will be in my prayers
May your baby rest in peace. I am so sorry for your loss. It is such a hard thing to go through. I hope that soon your tears and broken heart are replaced with all of the wonderful memories. God bless all of you.
Dear Friends
As the sun was setting Friday, Steve and I held our little baby girl in our bed [where she will sleep with us forever] as we released her into God's arms.
We miss her so very much; but, there came the time where all the daily pills and injections of fluids were never going to make her well again. She couldn't eat; her nausea was too great. We couldn't watch this beautiful angel of ours continue on this horrible path.
We grieve, cry and wonder why this happened to her.
Please know that I appreciate your replies; as it comforts me so. I ask that you ask God to heal our broken, painful hearts. I'm glad I found you all to help me. As I can feel your hugs and your tears that cry with me.
I will check back in a day or two... I'm still numb and in a daze and have no sense of putting anything together; including words.
Sandy
Wow, I am reliving this all over with you. Kidney failure in your babiy is a horrible thing. Did you read all of Sandy' story and what Sandy Grace and I went through the last hours of her life? Also, read Jaybays'. This will help you understand what you will face every day. It is cold and cruel, but the desperation is horrible and it feels like you and your baby are so alone iin this. My husband was in denial, and had hurt his back so he could not help me lift Sandy when she was so sick and could not stand on her own. I was almost furious at him because I needed that support. He loved her so much, but could not do a thing but rub her and tell her how much he loved her. He could not even bend over to give her ice chips or a syringe of anything she needed. You feel like a mother trying to help a child and you can't do anything. I, like you, spent every minute researching, talking to the vets to see what I could give her that would stay down and nourish her body, allow her to stay with me longer, I was obsessed with trying to save her. The minute she threw something up, I would start all over again trying to feed her something that would stay down. After they are in the 4t stage renal failure, there is not much you can do but try to keep them comfortable. I like you could not to eat because Sandy Grace could not eat and keep it down. It wears on you more that you will imagine until your precious baby is gone. I know you are not sleeping, I know you think about what you could possible do to help her all the time. Like I said in Sandy Grace's story, everyone in my life was worried about me because I was obsessed about making her more comfortable and trying to find a way to keep her with us. When I went to the grocery store to get more things to fix for her,
You know your baby, and she will tell you, (I promise you will know) when she is ready to go. Listen to her, you will feel so much better about your decision whatever it may be.
I could tell you to look after yourself during these horrible times, but it would be pointless. Even as you try to seelp, you will awaken ever few minutes in a start because you are afraid when you touch her, she will not be breathing. You never think about yourself when your baby is so sick. Desperation takes over and you will do everything you can until the end. I finally stopped trying to give her fluids a few hours before she died. I could go on and on about the agony both you and your baby are going through right now, but I don't have to describe it as you are living it minute to minute. Just hold her and tell her how much you love her and what a good baby she has been, she will understand you and tell her when it is time, it is O.K. to go.
I wish I could be encouraging, but there is no cure, only temporary solutions that will last for just a moment. I want you to know we are here for you and will be here for as long as you need us. Understand that our mother instinct takes over when we have sick babies and our husbands live in denial. We have to understand that, as we face so much of this alone. The love of your family, friends and husbands will support, but I know how alone you feel right now. Our friends on this site KNOW what you are going through, and this is by far the most love and support you will get because we lived and are still living your pain with you. A"ggieone
Kidney failure can happen in a number of ways, but most cases I've heard of are simply related to old age. Bacterial infections like leptospirosis can destroy kidney tissue along with toxins, tumors or even congenital problems. The Chinese haven't helped either since they've been poisoning our pets with melamine for some time before it was detected. The melamine caused kidney failure in many cats and dogs that ate it, and it even turned up in my cockatiel's food. I didn't learn about the recall until it was too late. He's still alive, but not doing well at all.
Anyway, kidney failure isn't something you can prevent with diet, but maintaining good general health and nutrition always helps. After the Chinese recall fiascos, I've been reading food labels a lot more closely. If any pet food lists "by-products" I don't buy it. That's all the stuff like beaks, feathers, innards, ears, snouts, hooves and meat from sick animals that won't pass inspection for human consumption. If it's not fit for me to eat, it's not fit for my dogs.
If it's detected early enough, chronic kidney failure can be managed pretty well with some effort. The problem is that it's something you have to be looking for. By the time symptoms show up to the point that we get worried, it's usually pretty well under way. After losing Chica, we've decided that our dogs are getting full blood workups every year once they reach 8 years of age and are in the "senior" category. I'll never get caught unprepared again. :-)
does anyone knowwhat cause the kidney failer, how can we avoid this in a dog, if i ever get one i would like to know what not to feed or do to stop this or is it something they just get?
You're doing everything you can to keep her as comfortable as possible, and that is all you can do now. Dogs can take Pepto (I gave it to my first dog who had horrible gas) but I think your vet doesn't want you to use it now because it would interfere with absorbtion of some of the meds she's on. Nausea and vomiting are the hands-down, absolute WORST symptoms of renal failure, and the hardest to keep under any kind of control. Have you noticed any of the reactions I mentioned with the metoclopromadine? Any restlessness or tremors? If not, just keep an eye out on her behavior and have some benadryl handy. My vet was totally unaware of the extra-pyramidal reaction until I found the study for him on the internet. You can always try injections if tremors get started. There's just something about bypassing absorbtion in the gi-tract that makes the restlessness and tremors worse than if it's injected.
Like you, I was terrified watching Chica starve to death. Was it kinder to end her suffering (if a bit early) or let her starve? Some people try to force feed, but I just can't agree with that as a solution. Dogs know when they can and can't eat, and it would probably just come back up anyway. You don't want to risk more vomiting and more fluid loss and electrolyte imbalance. If she likes ice chips, try freezing some pedialyte or even gatorade to help keep the electrolytes up. The odd thing with Chica was that she stayed hydrated until the last 36 hours when she completely stopped everything. Her electrolytes were in the normal range the whole time, so we never had to worry about sub-q fluids.
On the food issue, I offered several different things several times a day. You get to know when they may be up for trying and when it's impossible. We had a time where Chica would eat about anything I cooked myself in small amounts, but that didn't last long. You're at the point where ANYthing you can get into is better than nothing, and timing doesn't matter. Even chicken broth is better than nothing even though there's few calories in it.
Since your baby has not eaten in 2 days, it sounds like you need to prepare yourself for the end. Think about all the things she loved to do before she got sick. When there is nothing left, it's time to think about helping her to an easy ending. Saying goodbye is something that we all must go through when we decide to love an animal and take her into our lives and hearts. That's what makes critter people so very special. We do this knowing we will outlive them and be heartbroken, but we do it over and over again out of love. I so wish I had some words of wisdom to help you through this, but it's such a very personal thing. Somehow, we all find a way to survive it, grieve, and do it again.
Difficult as Chica was, we miss her every day. If she hadn't been the problem-child she was, we would never have had to learn as much about dogs as we know now. I feel like we honor her life by adopting another dog and putting that knowledge to good use. Had Chica not died of kidney failure, I couldn't speak of it to you now, so she is still helping others even though she's gone. Do what you must to keep her as comfortable as you can, and have no regrets over what will come. We're all here for you. :-)
I am so sorry for what you are going through. My Tiffy had to be put down for other reasons and the beginning of renal failure was the final straw. She had advanced heart disease and treating them both together was a double edge sword. My Tiffy stopped eating (which was what she LOVED to do most of all) and that was when I said enough is enough. It is never an easy decision to make. You don't know if you are selfish for keeping them alive, or selfish for putting them to sleep. I felt very guilty for a number of reasons for putting my dog down even though my vet (who treated Tiffy her whole life) told me it was the right thing to do. When your life becomes totally encompassing by your beloved pet you are very torn on your emotions. That is how I felt.
As others have said, YOU know your dog. YOU will know when it is time: and you do. Somehow, you just do. YOU know the quality of life your dog has had and you know when she has had enough. You will constantly second guess your decision but know that you are right. And when the time comes: you will get through that also. How? I still don't know how I did it , but I did. I think God and your pup give you the strength to make that selfless act that gives them (as Jaybay called it) their greatest reward. May God grant you strength and comfort at this most difficult time.
Thank you for your kindness in responding and for the info.
Jetta is on metoclopromadine, AMLODIPINE, BENZAPRIL, PEPCID A/C, compounded Aspirin and subq fluid.
I asked the vet if I could give her pepto-bismol or something else besides the Pepcid a/c; she said no.
I have a hard time giving her the pills; and my husband puts the subq fluid needle in her. I could not give shots. I did find a pill popper [this is a life saver] @ Petsmart; the cramming of pills down her throat constantly was awful.
As far as eating; I've found she is a fast food girl - Boston Market chicken and turkey, Olive Garden spaghetti; chicken nuggets...yuck. But, anything goes. I cooked salmon today, chicken thigh meat; morning star chicken patties; tater tots.... so far nothing has worked. for today. I did give her 1 cc of Nutri-Cal supplement. Later I will try oatmeal and applesauce. What do you do when they won't eat? How many things do you try in one day? Things she ate 1 or 2 days ago she won't touch now.
I bring her outside on the patio/pool area just to smell the breeze and to get fresh air. She loves the cold floor.
You would think that after beating breast cancer I would be strong enough to handle this. I am not.... I don't know what to do.... anything I do isn't going to change it.... that's what so hard.