how do you?

Question

How do you greive for a puppy? I had my little 16th month old puppy that i had to put to sleep . And i lost friends grand parents and this is by far the hardest one she was my little princess.  I feel like i lost my daughter, how do you greive and what do you do to help ease the emptiness and loss? Any advice is welcome just please be kind and sensitive.

chasha33 · Answer

I just wanted to tell you that what you have done to keep Nashville's memory alive is  wonderful.I still keep Chloe's collar and tag with me and i still cry for her all the time.My husband had me a necklace made that has a colored strand of her DNA in it that way she is always close to  me.She was my little girl and such a blessing to all who knew her.I dont think that there should be a time put on how long a person should hurt over the loss of there baby.Like i said,I still cry for her and i have had people make comments about how i should be over all my crying for her by now.But when you love something so much there is no limit to what a person may feel.

tb2011 · Answer

Hi everyone

Thanks so much for all your thoughts and comments over these pages. My main man Nashville was diagnosed with hemangiosarcoma in September 2010 and left us in January - aged 14. During those months, I searched the web for diet info, info about the condition's trajectory, and of course info about making the dreaded 'decision', and found this site a great comfort.

The only thing I'd add to all of your great thoughts is that I think it's important to consider the dog's personality when working out if / when to make the call. For example, Nash would NEVER have told me it was time - way too much of a fighter. So it was up to us to read signals. As it turns out, he went on his own terms a few hours before we were going to take him to the vet (that was typical of his personality too).

It's two months now and I still miss him every day. 

Regarding this issue of how to cope, I've found that talking about him often, crying when I feel like it, and also making tributes in numerous ways has helped me. His collar hangs by my front door, his tag is attached to my briefcase, I had a small plaque engraved and attached it to a bench in his park, and am thinking of a small tribute tattoo - it all has helped me.

Thanks everyone

       Nashville
      1997-2011
Friend, partner, defender

mamajune · Answer

I am owned by 4 toy poodles .I love them as much as any of my children.Sometimes  the love I have for  them hurts my heart .They are my little furry angels . I send you my sympathy.

heartfluttersflyawayplz · Answer

i put my sweet baby boy to rest 2 years ago and i still have my days, i got him at 6 weeks and he lived to be 17 years old so i was so lost.  i know have a little girl shes two and not looking to the day i need to rest her i hope i have 17 years with her to. 

they are our fur babies not a dog but a fur baby, so when they leave us we are lost and so hurt and empty. i could not stand him not being here so i had him creamated and he is in my office with me every day. i change his picture out on his box and i feel like his still with me strange huh. but it works for me.   

i pray you get peace and confort in know you did what you had to ,to make your fur baby at peace and no pain, that was love you showed to her and i know she thanks you for caring enought to help her out. God Bless you .

Bluenoselover · Answer

Linda, Ginger, Jaybay,Chasha,  
 
I can't thank you enough for your kind words, just knowing that i am not alone and that people do care it truely means a lot. I can't thank you enough for you consideration and your kindness. It makes the process just that much easier. It's a day by day thing but non-the-less  i know she is in a better place and one day i will see her again. 

Thank you again, your kinds words have made the start of my day that much easier.

chasha33 · Answer

I lost my 7 year old Peke,Chloe 8 months ago.I still cry everyday and i miss her more each day.I try to think about all our good times together.You need to think that atleast you where blessed enough to have gotten to love her for the time you had together ,than to have never gotten to have known and loved her at all.When i am having a really bad day i think of about that and i realize what a joy she was in my life.I know that she wouldnt want to see me crying all the time,When i would get upset she woud get upset to.So i know that she would want me to smile rather than cry when i think of her.There is no proper way to grieve and there is no time given on how long a person should and if there is a book out there that can tell any of us how to then i want a copy of it.It is going to take time and you will never forget what you shared with your baby.If you ever need to talk i am here.May God Bless You.

Jaybay · Answer

Time, my dear.  It does heal all wounds.  Grieving is a process, and we can't avoid that process whether it's for a beloved human or a beloved pet.  Loss is loss.  The death of my first dog hit me the same way.  It was worse than losing family members and friends.  

If you find you can't stop crying in a couple more days, please do see your doctor.  Anti-depressants or anti-anxiety meds can help you over the worst of it.  My doc was so understanding when I went to him.  I'm sitting there blubbering in the exam room and begging him for something to make me stop crying long enough to at least work without embarrassing myself.  I was very lucky that my first dose of lexapro (antidepressant) started kicking in the first day.  AD meds take a few weeks to work in most people.

A friend just reminded me of a Shakespeare quote:  “Come what, come may, time and the hour run through the roughest day.”   In other words, this too shall pass.  :-)

ginger899 · Answer

Owning a dog, loving a dog, is like that. We give our Hearts. They bring out the very best in us, they make our hearts more beautiful. Then, whether in months, or many years, they always break our hearts. But with the grief and loss comes a beautiful thing. At least we KNEW that little Soul, even if for a short time, we were enriched by having a special relationship with one of God's Creatures. We shared, we laughed, we played, we cared, we wept......Through them we became more Human.

I am very sorry you lost your little one. Mine feels like my little sister. That's how I feel about her. I cannot even bear to think about the end. But I will be there for her in her hour of greatest need. That was my promise to her.

And you were for your girl. You took good care of her right to the last second. Probably the last thing she saw was your face, the last thing she heard was your voice. That was all she wanted.

lindapalm · Answer

We put our dog to sleep over a month ago, and I agree with you, it is a horrible loss.  Its so quiet without them.  All you can do is tell yourself you had no choice and remember all the good and silly times you had with your little girl.  I'm sure she knew she was loved, and although she had a short life I'm sure it was a really good one.