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Ive always wondered about eating disorders. how do they work? i always thought itd be sumones choice whether or not they starved themselves. dont mean to judge but just dont get it

[LilDarlin09]

My best friend is somewhat bulimic. I say somewhat, because I know she's not as far gone as others are. I don't think they're so much a choice, as they are a feeling of need to be as close to 'perfect' as possible. She knows she's doing it, and she doesn't like doing it, but she thinks that if she has an excuse it makes it ok.
I myself could sadly be considered anorexic. I also know I could be much worse off than I am. I've always been the REALLY skinny girl that everyone was jealous of because they wished they were as tiny as me, or the gorgeous tiny girl that every guy wanted to date, which always fed my need to at least maintain how skinny I am. I used to curb my hunger by drinking orange juice instead of eating, and could go maybe a day or two without food. I was unbelievably sad at the point it started, too, though. It was a way to keep me feeling happy and at least good about myself.

[healthierme2020]

In the same boat w/LilDarlin. 42yrs old now and still smaller than I was in high school. All I know is how it is for me. I grew up in a way volitile situation. And the only thing that I could ever control was my weight. I enjoyed cutting an orange, arranging beautifully on a plate and making it last all day. And proudly throwing over half of it away. It's always brought me alot of attention from members of both sexes, and despise what society may say, they are obssesed with thin girls.
Now I am old even that some of my ED practices are coming home to roost. All I can say is that it is real, it is hard to conquer and I have to fight it for the rest of my life, not unlike my old heroin addiction. It's so hard because you do get to a point to where its certainly not a choice or a game anymore. I have harmed my body, could never have children, and thats just a few of the health issues it has caused. Believe me, if I knew how to make this end I would.
I cried tonigh because I had to eat some yogurt and granola. Not because I care anymore about the calories, but because I could barely gag it down, though I have made it quite clear to me recently that I have to eat, or this is going to kill me and with a quickness. Not looking for sympathy, just hope I did some justice to explaining what it's like for you because you were curious.

[LilDarlin09]

You can't have children?! :( I'm 19 right now, and I actually recently found out I'm pregnant. I'm just hoping I can handle the change in my body enough, and that I won't keep thinking I'm just getting fat when it's actually my baby getting bigger! There was a teen mom on last week (It's a slight addiction now that I'm having a baby), and she has had a lot of anorexia problems that really became an issue through her pregnancy. I'm really nervous, because everything that she says and does seems like something I would want to do. But I have my boyfriend and family to help push me through!

[pittfan17]

Thanks to your replies. best of luck and prayers for both of you

[healthierme2020]

Well congrats on the baby. There is actually a condition called pregorexia, where it's basically pregnant anorexia. However, though I don't know you, you seem aware that this could be a problem and that the time to get a gameplan to see you though this is now. None of these girls did, nor did they seem greatly concerned about the welfare of their children. I'm not saying that they didn't love them, they just didn't seem to beleive that their babies were in any actual danger.
And no, I could never have children. But I am 42yrs old now, and am actually ok with no kids. Still, the choice was not mine, and many other girls would not be ok with being unable to have children. It still is scary to think that I dieted so extremely that I literally stopped my menstual cycle for many years, and altered my future so drastically.
Use your support system, and just keep that baby that's going to bring so much happiness into lives front & center. I wish you & yours the very best and healthiest of times ahead.

[LilDarlin09]

Thank you so much, Dear :) I know that I'm going to make sure this baby is as healthy and happy as possible. I'll do anything, even eat all day everyday, if it means this baby is going to be ok.