This forum is for questions and support regarding Anorexia, Athletes, Binge Eating, Body Image, Bulimia, Causes of Eating Disorders, Dental Issues, Laxative Abuse, Male Eating Disorders, Media Images, Pregnancy, Support Groups, Teens
At first it started as wanting to lose abit of weight. Maybe like 5 pounds. The BMI had told me I was over weight. So I cut down my food. And would go for 3 bike rides a day (1 hour each). I would skip meals, ditch friends to work out. Leave the house to say away from food. In 4 weeks I lost 15 more pounds.
But it wasnt enough. I ate less and less. I would chew gum all the time and drink tons of water. On my boyfriends birthday he forced me to eat. Cake. I ate it. For him.
I cried. Biked to the store and bought laxitives. I took as many as I could. Then id take them everyday until I ran out of them.
I lost 4 more pounds. (2 months of dieting altogether)
I would starve myself for days. Then.BAM. eat toast and popcorn or watermelon. Then throw it all up. Because every calorie counts I told myself. Everyone. I had to get it out. Id throw up in the shower, outside, in the bathroom, anywhere I could. Then take lax and work out for hours.
Today I feel like I need help, but I dont want it. I want to be thin, its something I can do righr. That no one can control except me. today I threw up. I ate 1/2, a cup of strawberries, 8 baby carrots and tea.
I have developed depression & anxiety. I began to self harm and starve myself. I also suffer from short term memory loss due to the 3 sever head injuries I have had. I have been sexually, physically and verbally abused. By people I loved, peop
aww I am so sorry you have been hurt by people *hugs*
you are right though in thinking you need help, I was the same way about 6 years ago and the road is rough to getting better but it can happen and you will be okay :)
I am here if you need to talk or have questions about finding help. even if you just need to vent send me a message and I will listen.
I am not sure how old you are but I turn 22 next month
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