I know I'm not bulimic, but I do binge eat, and than throw up after. It started sometime last year I think. Or maybe even longer. How sad is it that I don't even know. Lately it's been getting bad. I don't do it often. I do it for a couple days a week, than stop, then a few weeks later again. Then don't do it for so long. Then I start up again. I don't know why I'm doing this. But I don't know how to get help. Does anyone know if I've damaged my teeth a lot? Or my esophagus? I'm nervous to go to the dentist because I don't want them to say anything to me about any damage. & I don't want my parents to find out. But I'm 18, so they can't say anything to them right? My medical records can't be looked at by others. I need to go to find out the damage I've done to my teeth, so maybe it can force me to stop. I don't think it should be that bad, cause it's not like I do it all the time right? Does anyone have any advice. Please, I'm lost. This website might be the only place I can get answers.
You say that you know you are not bulimic, but bingeing then purging (throwing up) are the hallmarks of bulimia. You do not have to do it every day for it to be considered bulimia. This is a difficult pattern of behavior to quit (not just stop and start again) on your own.
You should have medical evaluation to assess for any damage that may have been done to your body, nutritional counseling to normalize your disrupted eating patterns, and therapy to help you understand why you began doing this and why you continue it (not always the same), and what emotional/ psychological issues may underlie it. In some cases medication may be helpful in controlling the binge-purge cycle.
In my opinion, the best place to start would be with an assessment by a therapist experienced in treating eating disorders, who would then be able to link you with whatever additional services that may be needed. Participation in an eating disorders therapy group or support group can also be help, so that you will feel less loss and alone as you deal with this issue..
I agree completely with bluebutterfly. Eating disorders are difficult to resolve on your own and they don't get better over time, they get worse. Rather than worrying about the damage that you might have done, getting treatment for the problem so that you will stop doing damage is important. Physical problems from bulimia are certainly a cause for concern, but beyond that you don't have to live this way, you don't have to be miserable. I have 16 years recovery from an eating disorder and it is so amazing to be free from all of that. I suffered for many years before I got there and I encourage you to see a therapist experienced in treating eating disorders soon so you don't have to live most of your life with this disorder.Another resource is OA, Overeater's Anonymous which is a great free source of support and connection with others suffering from all forms of eating disorders.
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