I've been facing some new challenges with endometriosis lately, and I didn't know where else to turn but this forum. My story, sadly, doesn't have a very happy ending.
I have endometriosis. I've had severe pain since I was 13, and all the other traditional symptoms. I was put on birth control pills at 14. They worked well for a while, but eventually, I started to cramp and bleed even when on the pill continuously. My current gyno at the time told me to take breaks from the pills so my body could "recharge" when the pain came back, but when I started taking breaks every month or so, it's like I wasn't on the pill at all.
About a year ago, I found a great gynecologist who took me seriously and put me on progesterone pills. He told me to take them continuously, without breaks under any circumstance. He said the regular estrogen contains birth control pills contributed to my problem by fueling any possible endo. Those pills worked wonders for the first eight months or so. Recently though, the pain has started to return daily and I'm taking two doses per day. It's not like I can't handle it. But it does cast a shadow over everything. I can't be truly happy and carefree with this lingering, throbbing pain.
Throughout all of this, I've had an identical twin sister. Her symptoms were always the same as mine, but slightly worse. She unfortunately didn't get as much relief from the pills as me. Shortly after we both turned 18, my sister finally got a laparoscopy. It was confirmed - endometriosis, moderate in the scope of all cases, severe for her age. The surgeon excised and cauterized some of it, but left a majority of it because the lesions were small, speckled, widespread, and in places that couldn't be treated (such as near the ureter). There was a particularly bad patch on the abdominal wall, about two inches across. Her gynecologist told her he'd be willing to get more invasive when she has future surgery, even stripping part of the uterine wall, but for now, he's going to try Lupron.
Because of my symptoms and because we are identical, my own diagnosis is as good as confirmed. If Lupron helps my sister, I'll do it too. I'll need surgery as well down the line. Overall, this experience has been very emotionally draining. To have things end in bad news - "sorry, it's endometriosis and it's not surgically treatable" - is kind of heartbreaking.
I've felt a little numb to be honest. I've missed out on so much due to this pain - birthdays, weddings, holidays, vacations. I see so many women out there saying how birth control is bad because it "messes with your body" in an unnatural way, and they're happy to be "au-natural", and it makes me mad because I know going hormone free isn't an option for me. I shudder thinking about how my system has probably been thrown out of whack with so many different types of pills. So much for a holistic lifestyle.
I see all my friends living pain free, and I'm so horribly jealous. I feel like such a freak, because no one understands this disease and I don't feel like explaining it to a bunch of immature teenagers. None of this felt real until my sisters surgery, but now, the realization this could be a lifelong struggle has hit me like a tidal wave. Why did this have to happen to me so young? I'm only 18.
Sorry for the long rant. Usually I try to stay upbeat, but the pain was particularly bothersome today, so maybe that's why I feel so hopeless. If it was only an occasional thing I'd be fine, but the little things do add up. Any advice? Words of wisdom? Success stories (those would be amazing - everyone on this forum seems to have such bad luck). Anything?